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Today's question comes from Randy in Delaware. He says, I've been seeing a lady for over a year, and she has borrowed over $1,700 from me that she has not paid back.

I'm a single.

Ooh, I'm a single father with over $20,000 in debt.

My wife passed away and I'm living on just my salary.

I have a nine-year-old son and my daughter is 24.

I am serious about this lady, but it bothers me that she has not fulfilled her promise

to pay back my $1,700 after nine months. How do I approach her about this concern?

Randy? Listen. Oh, man, Randy. Sometimes I read these questions ahead of time, and sometimes I don't because I just want to feel the impact in the moment. What are you feeling right now? I'm feeling impacted. Yeah. How? Well, it's two parts to this, Randy. There's two parts to this. A, you lent her the money and whenever you loan money there's always a risk right there's a risk

that the person's not going to repay it that's the biggest risk and then the secondary risk is that

because they don't repay it or even if they do it will affect the relationship in some adverse way right

those are the two biggies of why we say don't loan money and you hit the nail in the head on both of them number one she's kind of being a scrub and not paying the money back and how are you supposed to feel good about this relationship because now it has the ability to create like a little bit of bitterness you take her out on a randy takes let's call her you know, Sheila, Randy takes Sheila out on a date. Let's call her Sally. Randy takes Sally out on a date. He's not going to feel good about picking up her steak dinner. He's already bothered. I'm going to tell you, okay, I'm going to talk to Randy like I would be talking to Randy if he showed up here and we had a cup coffee i would I would look at Randy and I'd say, Randy, I'm going to tell you what the problem is.

You are serious about this woman, Sally, aren't you?

And he'd go, yeah, I'm serious about her.

I go, yeah, and she knows it, doesn't she?

And he would go, she knows it.

She's not paying the 1700 back ever because sally is that her name

sally sally sally shela sally rye sally is banking on closing the deal is this what you think

i know i know what's going on he has made her feel like she's the one.

He told us in a simple email that he is serious about her.

She knows he's serious.

She thinks the 1700 is already their money and he's going to forgive it because he's going to put a ring on.

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