MPF 325: Let’s Get Intimate…
Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
Mike and Alicia Hernon : Catholic Marriage Parent and Family
5 • 739 Ratings
🗓️ 17 March 2025
⏱️ 76 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
“Lovemaking puts flesh on the vows that we exchange in marriage” - Byron and Francine Pirola
Summary
A few years ago in Australia, we met an amazing couple who we immediately wanted to share with our listeners. Byron and Francine Piroloa from Smart Loving, are on a mission to make marriages stronger all over the world and they are willing to talk about that subject that few couples will tackle - physical intimacy. We aired this podcast five years ago and it got such a great response that we decided to put it up again for all of you. Listen in as we talk to the Pirolas about how and why you should make time for sex, how the arousal pattern for men is different from women and why sex gets better and better the longer you are married! This is a podcast filled with wisdom, but also laughter and honesty. We hope you will enjoy listening as much as we enjoyed talking to them!
Key Takeaways
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Anything precious and unique needs rules to be protected. That is why the Church gives us boundaries in this area to teach us how to be appropriately vulnerable in our marital relationships
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A person’s sexual prime is in their 20s, but our erotic prime is reached in our 50s. This is a culmination of our relationship and our intimacy that is built over time.
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Sexual relations can slip into the “recreational” category in our minds when we are trying to survive. The antidote is seeing sex as a sacred communication that needs to be prioritized.
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Desire, arousal, climax, resolution is a typical male pattern. For most women the pattern is different - arousal, or foreplay, creates desire in the woman.
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We need to work and train our brains to connect with our spouse emotionally, to be present, so the intimacy that we share emotionally and physically.
Couple Discussion Questions
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How are we creating a romantic environment in our relationship? Where are we making space for marital relations?
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How are we opening our hearts to our spouse in lovemaking? Can we work on being present to our spouse and retrain our brains to focus on them?
Resources
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Free Conversation Starter on Sexual Intimacy: https://messyfamilyproject.org/guide/physical-intimacy/
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Smart Loving
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Marriage Kit
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Family Board Meeting April Course
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Family, all in this together. |
| 0:08.2 | Family, we're taking a chance. |
| 0:10.8 | Family, like birds of a feather. |
| 0:13.3 | Family, we got my shoes and dance. |
| 0:15.4 | Hey, we are Mike and Alicia Hernin. |
| 0:17.4 | We have 10 kids and grandkids too, and we are here for every parent. Because we are on a |
| 0:22.2 | mission to empower moms and dads to embrace their sacred calling. So join the conversation. |
| 0:28.0 | Welcome to the podcast. We're so glad that you joined us today. And I have a really great topic to talk to you about. |
| 0:40.2 | I mean, I really think we could probably never talk enough about this. |
| 0:44.5 | When we go out and do events, I usually get the most reaction when we talk about this topic. |
| 0:50.5 | That's true. |
| 0:51.6 | So five years ago, we did an interview with Byron and Francine |
| 0:55.7 | Parola, who are good friends from Australia. By the way, Australian friends invite us back. We |
| 1:01.7 | want to come back. We definitely want to come back. But we had them on to talk about physical intimacy |
| 1:07.2 | and marital intimacy. And it's something that I think that we just don't talk about enough as Catholics. |
| 1:14.3 | We did have an interview with Ellen. |
| 1:17.1 | You know, we have promoted. |
| 1:17.9 | There's more and more resources now for Catholic couples who are looking for help in the area of their sexual relationship. |
| 1:28.3 | And a strategy of the enemy, enemy is to get couples to have as much sex before marriage |
| 1:35.3 | and the least amount of sex after marriage. |
| 1:38.3 | That's right. |
| 1:39.3 | And there's something wrong with that. |
... |
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