In the start of this book in chapter one, you investigate this idea of pain points as

it relates to confidence. What do you mean by pain points?

So we could look at this in the form of sales as well. So I cannot sell to someone who

knows I understand their pain points. And I use the analogy that probably is the one

I've had most experience with people in the gym. They come, they sit down. Hi, James,

I want to get fitter. I want to lose a bit of weight. I want to tone up. And I'm like,

that's not really what you want. That's not a pain point. That is a knee-jerk reaction

to what you think I want to hear. When you delve a bit deeper, they go, my husband's

not fucking me. You know, every time I stand up in a meeting, I've got to pull my top

down over the layers of flap that I have. I don't feel confident in areas of my life

that I should because I'm so crippled by the confidence that I have with my physique.

I'm not taking seriously, the pain points are deep. And people need to draw on those because

the day that you're getting out of bed and you feel like shit and you're tired and you

want to give up, I want to be toned isn't going to do it. The fact that your real pain

point is that you're lonely and you're getting older and you're worrying about the fact

you might not find a compatible companion ever, that is a strong enough pain point for

you to change. Being more toned isn't so.

Interestingly, for some, you know, I know people that are in that exact same situation.

And I've debated for many a year whether if someone's, you know, the situation you described

like that, I'm getting older, I'm lonely, I'm scared I'll be alone forever. I know people

in that exact same situation that are exhibiting the fear of the consequences of a lifelong loneliness,

but they still don't do anything about it. Is there such thing as like wanting to want

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