Welcome to this on-air with Ella minisode. A little bite-sized boost to your day.

Always quick, always thought-provoking, and always under 10 minutes. Let's go.

We've only got one life. There is no dress rehearsal. And so if I can't go back in time and change things, but I can fix my future, I can take active steps.

I can get out of my own head and stop playing this horrible movie constantly.

Because what am I gaining?

For every emotion that we feel, we're trying to achieve

something. So when you're sad, when you're angry, when you're fed up, you're trying to achieve

something out of those emotions. When you feel good, when you start to feel positive, you feel

it internally, that motivates you to want to do something.

And it's not to say, I don't have sad moments, but I feel the sadness, but I don't, I don't stay in that

room or, you know, forever. You said something that I think we should highlight. You said, I had to make

myself the most important

person in this journey, for lack of a better way to say that. And I think that that is so critically

important because Sue, it's my belief that that's the only reason why this is working for you.

I'm not going to say it worked like it's over. But your path forward means that

you make space for your trauma and for your grief, but you also move forward. And so many people

think that that is selfish and aren't willing to make themselves the most important thing. Can you unpack that a little bit for us?

I'll tell you what the selfish thing is. The selfish thing there is not moving forward. You're

doing yourself and a massive injustice. This is your life. If you're driving a car,

this is your rear mirror. Okay. So, and every so often you get to glance at it, right?

And you're looking at it.

But you're not driving your car looking at that rear mirror.

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