When I was a kid we did not do the brand name cereal thing we did not do the brand name serial thing we did the cereal that came in bags and my friends, you know, things were maybe a little different place for their family. They would buy the kind of cereal where you got toys in the cereal and there were games to play on the they would also get the designer cereals like anytime a new toy would come out and

toy makers were like stupid kids will buy that let's make more of it except the kind you

can eat and so all my friends would get like Star Wars O's or Nintendo cereal. Somebody had like a

Legend of Zelda cereal that they got and something that I think we were

pretty dishonest with each other about his kids when we were eating that

designer cereal always at someone else's house was it effectively every

single designer cereal was just lucky charms but we were slightly different

shapes mixed in there there's a link boomerang or a master sword. Yeah, it's still a

marshmallow or a little piece of oat. I can see what you people are doing. He's got two

extra bucks out of my friend's parents. But now my parents. No, they saw through the facade. They

understood the game that was being played. We would walk right by all that

designer cereal and we would go to the section at the end where they had the

cereal in bags. And then we would walk by the section with the end where they had the cereal in bags.

And then we would walk by the section with the bags where the bags had names and color schemes

that vaguely resembled the cereal I wanted, like Colonel Crunchy or Fruit Circles.

And we go right past that, right down to the literally black and white generic section.

And there you'd have some white and a black impact font on it and it would say things like puffed

wheat or flakes of corn. It was literally exactly what the thing is. There was never a toy toy in there not even once and you know what it was just fine

so every morning I'd power through three bowls of this stuff I dump sugar on and yeah I get all

amped up and then by lunch I get this weird tunnel vision thing and I'd feel

shaky and wobbly and I never knew what the problem was and we go to the doctor and the doctors would look at my

parents and be like you have feeding him a bunch of sugar and they'd be like no and I'd be like no

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