(Matt Monday): What You Need to Know BEFORE You Get Into a Relationship
Love Life with Matthew Hussey
Matthew Hussey
4.8 • 2.9K Ratings
🗓️ 21 August 2023
⏱️ 15 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Does your life need to be “figured out” before you find “The One”?
This is the sort of advice married people LOVE to give: “Once you get your life together and you’re totally fulfilled and happy, the right person will come along.”
It sounds good. But is it true?
In today's episode, I’ll give you the truth about what you need to do when looking for love so you can find the right person for you without needing to be perfect!
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | I really don't like the idea that we have to be completely happy and enlightened |
| 0:05.7 | and have everything figured out and that's when the right person comes along. I think that's nonsense. |
| 0:10.9 | When people say you have to be happy before you meet somebody, before you find a relationship, |
| 0:36.8 | you have to be complete, you have to be fulfilled. Does any part of that great on you? |
| 0:45.7 | Because it does for me. It's hard enough, by the way, to be on your own when you want to find |
| 0:50.7 | someone without being then kicked in the head with, you know, you really need to be happy |
| 0:57.6 | before you find someone. Usually said to us by someone who's in a relationship who wasn't happy |
| 1:03.0 | when they met someone who's life did get better by meeting someone. So I have some good news for you |
| 1:08.7 | today. You don't need to be happy before you find a relationship. You just need to be happy enough. |
| 1:20.7 | Happy enough. Why is happy enough so important? Because you want to be happy enough that you don't |
| 1:29.3 | settle for the wrong thing. You want to be happy enough that if you find the right thing |
| 1:34.4 | but that person ends up treating you badly, you can walk away from it. You want to be happy enough |
| 1:40.3 | that the right thing doesn't become your everything. I actually, I really don't like the idea that |
| 1:48.5 | we have to be completely happy and enlightened and have everything figured out and that's when |
| 1:55.4 | the right person comes along. I think that's nonsense. Who is that? We are always working on |
| 2:03.4 | something. We're always going through some new problem, some new stage in our life that we weren't |
| 2:08.0 | ready for. We are going to do an awful lot of healing with the right person. In fact, I would |
| 2:14.4 | argue that the right person is partly defined by the person that is the greatest catalyst for that |
| 2:21.6 | healing. You can begin to heal with that person. You can be sued with that person in a way that |
| 2:27.9 | maybe you haven't been able to be in the past and because you're with someone where there's a real |
| 2:33.4 | safe environment that's created for growth and for healing, you kind of relax. You drop your |
| 2:42.5 | shoulders. You're not holding on so tight and you start to become more of who you can be. |
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