Manic Pixie Dream Cop (with Lauren Lapkus)

Keeping Records

Headgum

Comedy, Society & Culture, Places & Travel, Comedy Interviews, Documentary

5 • 726 Ratings

🗓️ 5 March 2021

⏱️ 75 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Actress, comedian, writer, and podcaster Lauren Lapkus (The Wrong Missy, Jurassic World, Crashing) creates a Golden Record full of experiences, emotions, and tastes. She will not, however, taste anything called "salad" that isn't an actual salad, because honestly that is a repulsive concept. Lauren's Artifacts Watching the opening credits of Who's the Boss (multisensory experience) The feeling of lost cat being found (multisensory experience) About Time (audio-visual) The sensation of peeing in the shower for the first time (multisensory experience) The taste and feeling of eating half-baked chocolate chip cookies while stoned (multisensory experience) Original Voyager Artifact Crocodile, Peter Beard (image) Hotter, Not Actual Voyager Artifact (But It Really Should Have Been One) Self-portrait in mouth of crocodile, Peter Beard (image) Follow Lauren on Twitter! Follow the show @keepingrecordspod Advertise on Keeping Records via Gumball.fm See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript

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0:00.0	This is a headgum original.
0:10.8	In 1977, NASA sent two solid gold records into space so that aliens might find them and understand life on Earth.
0:20.4	I sent greetings on behalf of the people of our plan-friender wishes to all who we encounter this voyager.
0:27.6	Now, we're making new records with our friends.
0:30.6	Good-jour, Tornu.
0:32.6	Honitjia.
0:33.6	Hello.
0:34.6	Al-a-s-a-a-a-laken.
0:35.6	We step out of our solar system into the universe seeking only peace and friendship.
0:42.7	We know full well that our planet and all its inhabitants are but a small part of this immense universe that surrounds us.
0:52.8	Hello from the children of planet Earth.
1:01.6	Hey, Keeping Records Heads.
1:03.9	Hey, Keeping Records fam.
1:05.8	We are, well, this is awkward.
1:08.9	We wish we were here for a better reason. We're kicking this episode off
1:13.8	with an apology. And if I sound weird, it's because Caleb's entire face is numb right now.
1:19.2	I just went to the dentist and they actually weren't able to get the tooth they were working on
1:22.7	numb. So we had to just go ahead and do it anyway. But that's not what we're here to apologize for.
1:28.2	We want to always be honest with you guys.
1:31.3	You guys are our friends and our family.
1:33.3	In this episode that you're about to listen to, we talk about an artifact on the original
1:38.8	records.
	...

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