You know, studies have shown time and time again that women claim to care more about climate change,

but don't actually want to make the necessary changes to help solve the problems.

I was telling my wife the other day, there's no need for us to be doing the dishes daily,

or showers, as that emits up to 109 kilograms of carbon a year.

That's assuming she's in there for a reasonable amount of time.

The other day Rebecca came to me and said, Tom, I'm going to work.

I need you to do the laundry and the dishes.

Why don't you just cut down a tree while you're out?

You know what I said exactly that.

And then the moment she left, I went into that hamper.

I took a this shirt out of there, put it back on.

I used this left sleeve to wash the dishes.

Mark, killing two birds with one stone, obviously metaphorically and not literally.

Last week I'm taking the wife to the park for her annual birthday picnic.

And we're already in a bit of a tip because she doesn't see eye to eye with me on my

no-flushing paw.

She in about 15 minutes into waiting for that bus.

I see her trying to call an Uber.

Does she not know that a vehicle emits up to five metric tons of CO2 a year?

I knocked the blackberry out of her hand and during the struggle,

the box of cereal I'm bringing for her birthday dinner goes everywhere.

And then instead of helping me pick it up and put it back in the box,

...