Much like you, I've got a lot to complain about, like open toe sandals.

Who thought that was a good idea? Who wants to look at toes? Adults who drink, squash.

Listen, you're a fully grown person.

But I just got my Sky TV and Broadband and I've got no complaints.

Sky is the lowest number of complaints made to off-com for pay TV and fix line broadband.

Divine out more, visit offcom.org.uk.

We're happy because you're happy.

Oh, Angon though, noise eaters, they're annoying.

Sky, believe in better.

Imagine you're a racing driver moments before your first ever-grown pre.

For a brand new team, which, like you, has never competed in Formula One before.

This then was how they'll line up. Sebastian Vettel, pole for Red Bull.

And in the pit lane, we'll be the two Hispanic racing cars Bruno Senna and Karen Chandog.

You only found out you'd be racing 10 days ago.

You've barely driven your car because it was still being put together and fixed during the practice sessions.

You did four laps in qualifying. That's it.

After the predictions and the promises at last, the performance.

Performance? Your hopes aren't high.

You'll be sharing a track with your childhood hero Michael Schumacher and three other world champions.

Fernando Alonzo, JensenButton and Lewis Hamilton.

But your car is 10 seconds a lap slower than those at the front.

Your target is just to make the checkered flag.

...