Hello guys. Good morning. Happy Wednesday. I'm coming to you almost live from London. I don't like when I can't be live with you, but I do love that these pre recorded Wednesday episodes give me a chance to read through all of your emails and listen to your voice

emails because it's a whole new different genre. It's a genre. Sorry, that's a take-dack thing if you don't get it, but it's fun to read what you guys write and sometimes you guys write the funniest longest emails and I'm cracking up to myself. And so we have a couple of amazing emails today. We have a lot of voice mails, but keep writing in keep leaving voice mails because I love to hear your guys voices. And I know that sometimes it's scary to call in. A lot of you start your email saying I want to call in, but I'm nervous and I totally get that. It's a lot. So,

you can always email me DM me send a carrier pigeon, whatever. I am here for you guys. Before we get started, I have to tell you I'm absolutely buzzing. You want to know why I got at tanks on Instagram. I went in to meet the lovely team in Instagram. And first of all, it was so cool because I ran into a girl, my pal from high school. And I'm, I'm a little old. Okay. I've been out of high school a long time. Over 10 years, I haven't seen you.

I haven't seen my friend Shrina and she's like, she walks in and I'm like, oh my God. And she's like, yeah, hi. So she's like this badass at Instagram now. Super high up on this really cool team got to reconnect with her, got to talk to a bunch of people at Instagram and tell them about creating and what it's like and the ins and outs. And it was wonderful. And they're so fabulous. And then I got at tanks on Instagram. And I'm just so happy.

So now at the end of every show, I can just say you can find me at tanks everywhere. And now I like it because my show feels like it has its own name. It's me tanks and it's me tanks live enough about me and my Instagram handles. Let's get to you guys. I can't wait to hear these voicemails. So let's have a listen.

Hi, my name is Gordon and I live in Washington, DC. My question for tanks is how does she deal with the let down of a right person wrong timing situation? How do you process that let down? I had a very healthy relationship last autumn. It broke off because I was the wrong time in my life.

And to be honest with you last month, I went on maybe the best state of my life, but she's moving to Ireland in two months for a PhD program and she didn't want to date casually. I don't really either, but it was really a good day. So I'm wondering, what do you do? Do you let it go? And how? Thanks.

Okay, I love this question because it touches on this core question that a lot of you guys wonder about and I have a pretty. I have a pretty defined opinion on this one. So at the core of his question, it's.

I mean, he's asking what do you do to feel better and I'm going to get to that in a point in a second, but my first point is I don't think that there is such thing as wrong timing right person because if.

If it is truly the right person, you will find a way to make it work now there are a few exceptions before I hear the naysayers before all of that good stuff there are a few exceptions and yes moving to Ireland is is a very good exception. Okay, that's a very good exception. There's always exceptions to rules.

But at at its core, if you feel yourself, like I would have loved to hear more about why it wasn't the right time in his life with this relationship that he was in previously because if it's the right person, it is the right time.

So barring someone moving to a different country, barring someone being in medical school, which I always use that example because we've actually had a couple people call and write in saying, you know, the other person's medical school, listen medical school is like.

I think one of the toughest things to do on planet earth and and that is like a whole whole different ball of wax so that that is another exception to the rule unless you're moving to Ireland or you're in medical school.

If it's just general met feeling if you're just like i'm just not ready or whatever.

I just don't think that it's the right person because I have seen friends say, especially guy friends be like i'm going to be single like i'm i'm ready for a year of singlehood they meet a girl and the next day they're like i want to marry this girl it's time it's time.

And it plays a lot into box theory right because I think that especially with guys when they need a girl they really they know that it doesn't matter if they had if they had promised themselves that they were going to have single boy summer or whatever the fuck okay.

Okay back to our friend here so would have loved to know more about why it was in the right time in your life and read this Ireland girl I mean yeah I get it she doesn't want to date casually she's moving but I personally would spend the rest of her time trying to get to know her to see if she is someone that you want to pursue listen long distance distance isn't a death sentence for a relationship people make it work so instead of just shutting it down if you really really like.

Really really really like her pull the thread see what happens if you have that genuine attraction to her there you know you can say to her look I don't want to date casually either but I really have this crazy spark with you and I really want to get to know you.

That's what I would do in this case because I mean it sounds like you are very interested in getting to know her but then again if she says like look I'm moving and I don't I'm not interested I'm not interested in even pulling the thread you have to respect that too.

In terms of your original question because I've gone on quite the rant here about right wrong time right person how to feel better about it I think I think you have to quiet the noise I think you have to listen to your heart as cheesy as that sounds as cliché as that sounds so again I would go back to you know your previous partner and think like why did they why were they why was it why was I not ready you know what aspects of our relationship made me feel not ready or made me feel like I'm not interested in you.

I feel not ready or made me feel close off or made me feel close in I would I would really do some introspective self work because more often than not it's like what's going on inside there.

But it's an interesting one I know a lot of people disagree with me and so that's why I am saying with a big red sign there are exceptions to this role but I tend to think if it's really the right person you make it work.

...