And so it's your intentions you connect with and that way you don't get caught on your short-term gains or your short-term losses or whatever

You connect with those intentions you know those appear connect with the faith and then you surround yourself with people that keep you on that track and raise that temperature

And that's something anybody now can think about and say okay

Which one of those things am I not doing well if maybe all three and how can I start to take the action steps even today

To start changing one of those in an intentional way

Yes, absolutely and by the way the reason I list those three is at one point I lacked all three at one point at a very low identity if one point had no self-confidence

Hopefully

People are inspired by the fact that I'm a really average dude and I don't say that to like be self-deprecating

I really am

Yeah because that's hard for us to believe that I mean that's hard for us to believe that I got to take a time out and I want to get back to these points

But Ed you it's hard to believe you were ever average so can you explain this to and make us believe it because you seem like a high performance person in all aspects of your life

And it seems like you always have been somehow so tell us how that's not true

I'm not going to be dishonest and say that I'm not now I am

I mean I have bad days and I'm sad and frustrated and all that stuff but I wasn't

We'll get into in a minute but I was I'm this child of an alcoholic

I'm the oldest son the oldest child of an alcoholic and a drug addict

When you grow up in that kind of chaos and anxiety you're ashamed you think you're nothing I would leave my house most days man and go why do I

Why can't I have a good family you know and you attach your identity to how screwed up your families my friends wouldn't even come over my house as a kid like your dad yells too much

Our neighbors could hear it when I'd walk outside I was ashamed because they could hear it and then I'd go to school

I got beat up and bullied I was I was really little I was so thin as Eddie Spaghetti your meatballs are ready I got teased every day

And I just there were even points in my life as a child that I reflect as I've gotten older where I wasn't even sure I wanted to live

I never was suicidal but I was one of what's the point right so I had none of that

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