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Don't Mom Alone Podcast

I'm Happy for You (Sort Of...Not Really) :: Kay Wyma {Ep 85}

Don't Mom Alone Podcast

Don't Mom Alone Podcast

Kids & Family, Leisure, Parenting, Education

52.3K Ratings

🗓️ 30 August 2015

⏱️ 49 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

What if your son can't read as he enters first grade? What if your daughter prefers wrestling to ballet? What if your living room sofa has a couple rips and stains from a decade of use?

These things shouldn't be a big deal. But then you notice your friend's first grade boy is reading chapter books. . . and her daughter gracefully glides into class with a giant bow on her head . . . and their living room just got a make-over with coordinating floor-to-ceiling curtains.

Personally? My feelings of "less than" often start at a place of comparison. I know I shouldn't compare. I know it doesn't make me feel good. Yet day after day I glance around making sure I keep pace with the Joneses.

How do I move past comparison to contentment? And even more important, how do I get to a place where I can celebrate her athletic child or new couch or beach vacation?

Well, today's podcast guest, Kay Wyma, shines a light on the age old comparison problem and guides us to a better place of connection and true community.

In Kay's latest book, "I'm Happy for You (Sort Of . . .Not Really)", she helps readers find contentment in a culture of comparison.

"Looking at what we lack prevents us from noticing how sweet the world already is. But when we shift our focus from what could be to what actually is, we find extraordinary joy in our ordinary lives."

I've been a big Kay fan since a dinner party over six years ago. As I sat hugely pregnant with our 3rd son, she encouraged me in my role as young mom.

Kay is authentic, brilliant and refreshing. My hope is her wisdom and practical tips in this episode help you stop comparing and draw you closer to the women you interact with daily.

What we chat about:

  • Encouraging one another by running alongside, instead of determined to "win"
  • Focusing on "being together" more than hosting the perfect dinner party
  • Being our best instead of being "the best", discovering our "you"-niqueness
  • How a "mental" computer reboot (cnt/alt/del) helps fight comparison
  • Whose light is revealing your reflection (& the Kylie Jenner Challenge)
  • How to help our kids navigate social media and speak life to their friends
  • How our friends can help us "reboot" the messages we believe.
  • How to enter back-to-school with fresh perspective, moving from comparison to compassion (repurposing school supplies).
  • Why I can never look at an Instagram pic of feet on the beach the same way.

Connect with Kay:

The MOAT Blog :: Facebook :: Twitter

Links Mentioned:

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Because we've all been uniquely gifted, like you, why oh you,

0:05.0

Nick.

0:06.0

And it's like, are we going down that road of really becoming

0:10.5

who we are made to be like our best, which I think this is so

0:14.0

important for the kids.

0:15.2

You know, we seem to celebrate some concept of the best.

0:19.2

Like there's a superlative that you could actually reach.

0:22.6

And it doesn't exist.

0:23.8

And it's as if we could focus a lot more on their best,

0:28.0

really grooming them and helping them know what their giftedness is.

0:32.5

Then there's so much more walking alongside than walking against.

0:36.6

And it's a tiny bit swimming upstream, but the more people that we do it together,

0:41.4

the better it is because there's really life in that.

0:44.0

And then you can encourage and then you can get to that spot of possibly

0:48.2

saying the life-giving words I'm happy for you.

0:50.6

Because there really is life in that.

0:55.0

You are listening to episode 85 of the God Center Mom Podcast.

0:58.8

Today I'm chatting with Kay,

1:00.1

Wima, good friend, author of a couple of books,

1:02.8

cleaning house and her newest one.

1:04.6

I'm happy for you, sort of, not really.

1:07.8

She's a mom to five.

...

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