4.4 • 1.9K Ratings
🗓️ 21 November 2024
⏱️ 18 minutes
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One way to feel more thankful for things is to imagine life without them. We explore a practice shown to help you see the bright side, even when you feel down.
We know gratitude is good for us, but what if we’re struggling to feel it? This week’s guest, author and podcast producer Stephanie Foo, finds herself missing her close-knit “chosen family” in California since moving to New York. Foo tries a practice called mental subtraction, where she imagines her life without New York.
Later, gratitude researcher Ernst Bohlmeijer shares how gratitude practices can reshape our emotions and possibly our whole outlook, and how the Mental Subtraction of Positive Events practice can be antidote to taking things for granted.
Practice:
Find the full Mental Subtraction of Positive Events practice at our Greater Good in Action website: https://ggia.berkeley.edu/practice/mental_subtraction_positive_events
Today’s guests:
Stephanie Foo is a radio producer and author of the book What My Bones Know: A Memoir of Healing from Complex Trauma.
Learn more about Stephanie and her book: https://www.stephaniefoo.me/
Follow Stephanie on Twitter: https://twitter.com/imontheradio
Follow Stephanie on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/foofoofoo/
Follow Stephanie on Facebook:https://tinyurl.com/yx6pwdnf
Ernst Bohlmeijer is a psychology professor who studies gratitude at the University of Twente in The Netherlands.Learn more about Ernst and his work: https://tinyurl.com/2p92p6vn
Science of Happiness Episodes like this one:
Transcript: https://tinyurl.com/4r84778r
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0:00.0 | I think February is the worst month in New York because you've been cold for like five months. |
0:10.0 | I get really bad seasonal effective disorder too. |
0:15.0 | It's just being inside and there's no leaves on the trees and everything's gray and it's just gray. Everything's gray. |
0:24.8 | I lived here since 2014 and before that I lived in California my whole life. In my head I have like |
0:32.9 | the bright red of the red woods and the bright green and leaves and sun and flowers and my friends |
0:43.6 | and I going out to eat. |
0:45.6 | I think that's one of the reasons why I miss California so much is because my closest friends |
0:50.6 | all live in California. |
0:52.4 | These are friends that I've had most of my life or friends |
0:55.7 | that I've at least had for like 15 years. And it's hard to miss that ease of when you're just |
1:04.8 | around someone and you don't have to put on airs. You don't have to pretend. And it's just simple. When you don't have to put on airs. You don't have to pretend. And it's just simple. |
1:13.2 | When you don't have family, which I don't, |
1:16.9 | your friends become family. |
1:19.6 | And you build these really sort of lifelong, |
1:24.8 | deep, profound relationships with friends. It feels like this deep, deep, profound relationships with friends. |
1:28.3 | It feels like this deep longing ache where, as I put on like another layer of socks, |
1:36.3 | I'm like, oh my God, how do we cultivate gratitude when we're not feeling all that thankful? |
1:55.0 | I'm Dacre Keltner. Welcome to the Science of Happiness. |
1:58.0 | This week we're revisiting a favorite episode of ours, where we explore a practice in mental |
2:03.9 | subtraction that's shown to help us feel gratitude by imagining life without the good things |
2:10.3 | we have now. |
2:12.5 | When our guest Stephanie Fu moved to New York City, she deeply missed her California connections. So she envisioned |
... |
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