How to Explore Your Sexual Fantasies Without Shame | ft. Sexologist Carol Queen

Sex With Emily

Health & Fitness, Sexuality

4.2 • 6.7K Ratings

🗓️ 15 August 2025

⏱️ 44 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Join the SmartSX Membership : https://sexwithemily.com/smartsx Access exclusive sex coaching, live expert sessions, community building, and tools to enhance your pleasure and relationships with Dr. Emily Morse. List & Other Sex With Emily Guides: https://sexwithemily.com/guides/ Explore pleasure, deepen connections, and enhance intimacy using these Sex With Emily downloadable guides. SHOP WITH EMILY!: https://bit.ly/3rNSNcZ (free shipping on orders over $99) Want more? Visit the Sex With Emily Website: https://sexwithemily.com/ In this enlightening episode of Sex with Emily, Dr. Emily reunites with the legendary Carol Queen, sexologist, author, and co-founder of the Center for Sex and Culture in San Francisco. Carol, who's been Good Vibrations' staff sexologist for over 30 years and has been speaking publicly about sexuality for 50 years, returns for an essential conversation about revitalizing routine sex, navigating physical challenges in intimacy, and finding your sexual community. This episode tackles everything from making masturbation part of your self-care routine to creative solutions for mobility challenges in the bedroom. Carol breaks down how sexual discourse has evolved from underground feminist publications to mainstream media, while emphasizing that there's no "normal" sex life everyone must follow. We explore practical techniques for spicing up routine encounters and dive into the importance of finding consensual spaces for all types of sexual expression. We take listener calls from Jess, who wants to elevate his hookup routine with temperature play and atmosphere, Tommy, who's seeking advice on approaching older women, Jake, who's looking for safe spaces to explore exhibitionist fantasies, and John, whose wife's knee problems require creative positioning solutions. Carol's decades of experience shine through as she emphasizes that variety and difference make sexuality beautiful, not something to be ashamed of or conform to arbitrary standards. 0:00 - Introduction 1:20 - Caller Question: Spicing Up Gay Male Hookups & Avoiding Boredom 7:13 - Dating Older Women: How to Start Conversations & Build Confidence 10:05 - Preventing Recurring UTIs: Practical Tips & Product Recommendations 13:45 - Interview with Sexologist Carol Queen: 50 Years of Sexual Liberation 16:15 - How Sexual Discourse Has Changed: From Underground to Mainstream 20:32 - The History of "Pegging" & Educational Porn vs Entertainment 31:14 - Sex Positions for Physical Challenges: Knee Problems & Alternatives 41:03 - Quick Fire Questions with Carol Queen

Transcript

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0:00.0	Because it's self-care. If we don't think in terms of masturbation is self-care already,
0:05.5	I bet a bunch of people have had their minds changed or blown or opened up this year because
0:10.8	there's stress everywhere.
0:16.4	You're listening to Sex with Emily. I'm Dr. Emily and I'm here to help you prioritize your pleasure
0:21.2	and liberate the conversation around sex. Today I'm talking with the incredible Carol Queen,
0:26.3	author, sexologist, and co-founder of the Center for Sex and Culture in San Francisco.
0:30.8	Carol's been speaking publicly about sexuality for 50 years and has been the staff sexologist
0:35.4	at Good Vibration since 1990.
0:38.1	She was actually on one of my very first podcasts, so having her back feels like coming full
0:42.3	circle.
0:43.3	We're covering everything from spicing up your sex life when things get routine to navigating
0:47.3	physical challenges in the bedroom.
0:49.3	Carol and I take calls about dating older women, making oral sex exciting again and dealing
0:53.9	with recurring UTIs.
0:55.4	We also dive deep into exhibitionist fantasies, sex parties, and finding your people in consensual
1:01.3	spaces. My intention is to bring you wisdom from someone who's been liberating sexual
1:06.4	conversations for decades, reminding you that there's no such thing as a normal sex life you have to follow.
1:12.7	Variety and difference are what makes sexuality beautiful. All right, let's dive in.
1:20.4	Let's talk to you just in California. Emily, how are you? Hi, I'm good. How are you?
1:28.0	What's going on? My name is Jeff, actually. I talk kind of fast sometimes. I'm a gay male. Okay. And during this COVID, and actually before the COVID, I had this thing where I liked to like suck dick, you know? Yeah. Okay. Makes sense. On brand. The guys like it. And so I have like, but I'm getting kind of carried away lately with COVID because I'm like, I have a house by myself. Not many gay men have a house and a car and a job. And so I need some help because they come over like two or three times and I start to get bored. I got to like spice it up a little bit. I need some input. What can I do?
1:58.0	Wow. What are you saying? You want to spice up your blow jobs? Well, yeah. I have these guys. There's like two or three that come up all the time, like consistently. We have sex. We hook up. And it gets more. I get bored easy. Okay. Well, I've got some, I mean, you've come to the right place. Let's make them interesting. Let's make sex interesting.
1:58.9	I mean, here's the thing.
	...

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