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Girlfriends (A Podcast for Catholic Women)

How to Cope with Hard Change

Girlfriends (A Podcast for Catholic Women)

Danielle Bean

Kids & Family, Parenting, Religion & Spirituality

4.9810 Ratings

🗓️ 20 August 2019

⏱️ 44 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

This week we are talking about seasons of change in motherhood, and how we can best cope with them. Whether you are sending a child off to college or to kindergarten, moving into a new neighborhood or starting a new job, change can be a challenging thing to cope with. Snippet from the Show “A change may be hard, but that doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. The more we focus on our gratitude, the more we can see the positives of that change.” SHOWNOTES Here are some ideas that can help: Let yourself feel the feelings. Don’t “stuff” your feelings, but allow yourself to feel them. Be honest about the fact that when a child moves out, there are parts of that change that are a loss to you, and it hurts. But don’t “sit down” in there. Do not wallow in your feelings. Make sure you know that your thoughts are the boss of your feelings. In other words, you cannot control how you feel, but you can control how you think and act on those feelings. Be gentle with yourself. Build margin into your days, let go of some more demanding things in your life and in your schedule to allow yourself the time and energy you need to make this transition. (Here is the homeschooling book I mentioned in this part : Teaching from Rest by Sarah Mackenzie) Start something new. Think of a new habit you might like to begin and attach it to this time of change. Look for ways that this time of transition might be an opportunity for new, positive things in your life. Give thanks. So many of the changes we struggle with are also enormous blessings. Remember to pause and give thanks for your children, for your motherhood, for your home and family, even as you struggle with changes inside of those relationships. This week, I also share feedback from listeners Lillian and Jenay, and I answer a question from Taylor about vaccines. RESOURCES My episode on The Art of Letting Go (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/episode-36-the-art-of-letting-go-035/id1073361940?i=1000374713722) EVENTS Saturday, November 16, 2019: You Are Enough Retreat at Holy Family Catholic Church in Orlando, FL Saturday, January 11, 2020: You’re Worth It Retreat, St. Michael Church, Exeter, NH Saturday, March 7, 2020: You’re Worth It Retreat at Precious Blood Parish in Jasper, IN Saturday, March 28, 2020: Women’s Conference in Norwich, CT

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Transcript

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0:00.0

Girlfriends, episode number 186. How to Cope with Hard Change.

0:09.1

Hello and welcome to girlfriends. I'm Danielle Bean. I'm a wife and a mom and I'm on a mission

0:15.4

to help you know your worth as a woman so you can find peace, balance, and joy in family living.

0:21.7

This week, we are talking about change.

0:24.0

It's a season of change.

0:25.5

Is there change going on in your life?

0:27.1

How to cope with that in a positive way?

0:28.8

Let's get started.

0:37.0

Hey, girlfriends. How are you? Glad you're here. Always love being able to connect with you

0:41.8

together on the podcast and that only works when you show up. So thank you for doing that. Thanks for

0:47.2

being here. This week, we're talking about a sort of hard subject for me, a sort of raw subject for me, talking about coping with

0:56.7

hard change. Now, I gave it that general title, but really what's inspiring this is this is what I

1:03.5

last year around this time of year. I called this season the goodbye season, because that is what it felt like to me that fall had all of a sudden become a time that I almost dreaded after a summer of fun with most of my kids home or many of my kids home under my roof for the summertime.

1:25.5

Then the fall was when they were all going back to school and

1:28.3

other places. And that was sort of a time of goodbye for me. And it became almost, well, no, not almost.

1:35.7

It became a negative thing for me. And it was hard for me. I really struggled with it,

1:40.6

especially two years ago, three years ago, when my son Ambrose went away to college

1:46.9

down in Florida. And then I struggled with it again last year when my daughter Juliet was the first

1:52.2

to leave. It just started to feel like a very melancholic time of year because we were saying

1:58.6

goodbye to all these kids, which, you know, is a happy thing,

2:01.8

but it's a tough thing for us to adjust to. It's a season of change inside of our family lives,

2:08.3

inside of our marriage, inside of our work lives, inside of our daily routines. It affects

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