Hello! So you want to be a pirate, my lad? Well, let me tell ye, being a pirate be all about branding.

Yarr, it's a business, but branding be bringing in the booty, and if ye be shipping with our jolly crew, ye need love this Jolly Roger.

Question, isn't waving a pirate flag like waving a We Are Thieves flag? It seems not helpful.

This skull and crossbones be more

than just a bit of arg look at us its plumage prerequisite for plundering as pirates we be

wanting booty booty booty bellicious but parties protect their booty preferring it unplundered

so we must plunder asunder which tis a lot of work and risk. Who needs that? See, we want free booty.

When we ask for booty, booty to be granted, and bounce.

But why would a ship just give up?

The branding!

Plus a surprise reveal!

You were right, we don't fly the flag for fun.

We fly false flags, keeping the Roger hidden for just the right moment.

Our ship be lean and mean, and we hide this too.

With prey in sight, we billow barrels behind, so though our sails be full, our speed be slow,

and we seem fat and full with supplies kept above deck for greater effect.

Okay, that's pretty clever.

But this be my favorite, a camouflaged hull, painted canvas unfurled to cover

the true number of guns. Behold, that looks pretty fake. Y'ar, it need only look good from afar.

Ships be seen at a distance through a looking glass on the high seas. Branding is image, not reality.

And Empire and merchants do the reverse, carving and painting fake cannon to intimidate.

But fake guns don't shoot, now do they?

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