Before her son entered ninth grade, Dana says he managed his time online pretty well.

He plays music. He plays drums. He plays guitar. He sings. He draws. He writes. He reads. He had enough things to keep him busy otherwise. So it had never really been a source of conflict until fall of 2023.

We're not using Dana's full name because her son is a minor. The fall of

2023 was a bumpy time. And before we go any further, we want to warn you that today's story

contains graphic descriptions of self-harm. Dana's son was being bullied at school. The core

friend group he'd had for a long time had broken apart. And his parents were separating. There was

a lot of change. At the beginning of

the school year, Dana noticed her son was retreating into his phone. He had an iPhone, so I had

Apple parental controls set up. Dana set up screen time locks for some websites. She limited his time

online. He wasn't allowed on social media. But then she'd find out he had figured out some way around

everything. His personality was also changing. Dana said he was isolating himself. He stopped doing

things he used to enjoy. And over a few months, she became aware that he was self-harming. At first,

it was just small cuts on his arms. Sometimes he'd come to her afterward asking for help.

He said he felt like he was losing control.

We were given a safety plan to lock up items in the home that he could use to harm himself.

But it seemed like somehow he kept finding other items to harm himself.

Before all of this began, Dana's son had already been seeing a therapist.

He's neurodivergent, and she says therapy helped equip him to navigate a neurotypical world.

Dana brought up the self-harm and the behavioral changes at his appointments.

She says they were told it was normal teenage stuff, even that he should spend more time online because it's where he seemed to be finding community.

But Dana was starting to worry that actually he was being radicalized online.

He'd started dropping what she calls extreme political comments into conversations, including neo-fascist talking points.

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