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We Can Do Hard Things

How Do We Make–and Keep–Good Friends?

We Can Do Hard Things

Glennon Doyle & Audacy

Society & Culture, Relationships, Education, Self-improvement

4.841.1K Ratings

🗓️ 27 January 2022

⏱️ 67 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

1. How chronic social isolation throughout the pandemic has impacted our friendships–and why that’s affecting our mental health and cravings for connection. 2. Glennon, Amanda, and Abby each make a Next Right Thing plan for prioritizing friendship in their lives. 3. How we grieve a friendship ending when there’s no cultural template or ritual to acknowledge that deep loss. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hi everybody, you came back. Welcome back to We Can Do Hard Things. We are proving that we can do hard things by talking for significant amounts of time about things we know nothing about.

0:27.0

That issue this week being, do do do do friendship friendship. Why?

0:37.0

What? What?

0:41.0

I mean, it's just such an interesting thing to discuss right now because wow, is this a doozy of a time in human history in terms of

0:56.0

everything, one being connection and like how if connection we were talking so much in the last episode, if connection is what we need in order to be happy and healthy, if there's no question about why we're so freaking unhappy right now.

1:15.0

I mean, we have we have we have we ever been so isolated from each other and more just in meshed with just like the people we live with if we are living with anyone in an unhealthy way probably right just to be totally solely dependent on a few people.

1:35.0

And then just so isolated from friendships we're used to from community community. How are you doing, Sissy, what do you think of all of this when everything started in 2020 there was a little bit of

1:52.0

like a kind of it was horrible and sad, but you have like some energy you had some like Rosie the Riveter situation where you're like I can do it I can pull through and and gather my resources and my people and we can find a way and like

2:13.0

a bazillion teen years later and we're still going through it it just feels like surrender Sarah it's just like it's just like it's just like it's just like what even why no this is just life now it's just like a wall man it's a wall and I think that I think that actually

2:40.0

the social isolation has been this kind of creeper that we haven't really registered I mean obviously it's been overwhelming stress it's been that having to re-invent and then our lives it's been fear for families it's been all of this but I think a silent player in this has been

3:02.0

what we didn't recognize was fortifying us through the other times you know these connections these kind of everyday interactions and also the reliance on these ritualized connections with friends the disappearance of that because we culturally don't value it it disappeared silently and we don't connect the kind of serious

3:26.0

anguish that you know speaking only for myself we're going through right now I think a lot of it is attributed to that that's so interesting and especially as someone who I mean I think on the introvert scale I'm probably a 10

3:44.0

hundred and I'm being most introverted I can tell myself and I hear a lot of people saying this in my little you know highly sensitive

3:58.0

introvert community of people we really believe that this is the these are the conditions that we actually need to thrive

4:08.0

and I really think that even me even an introvert 10 I have not been doing very well lately just psychologically daily I think I have finally proven to myself that I actually do need other human

4:26.0

beings in some form not just in pages of books right just on my computer but actual human beings because I think you're right I think that's the one of the major traumas of right now I was writing a thing the other day about how we all need to

4:46.0

you know the idea that everyone just keeps saying I'm so over it I'm so over it well okay being so over it does not in fact make it over like there's no amount of angst and anger and apathy that we can have that will then result in a pandemic just being over like it and that's part of the

5:06.0

Sarah surrender thing even though we don't have any more capacity to deal with this we must we still have to because it's still existing I was writing about that and I put out the like you know we have to keep showing up to for each other because we belong to each other

5:22.0

it was like who's the we I have forgotten who the we is when we're out in the community when we're seeing other people when we're connecting even those

5:30.0

people annoy us even then whatever there's this idea of the we that is kind of what keeps you going and now it's just without seeing each other without looking each other's eyes the we is gone and then I think the we has actually crumbled a little bit because of

5:48.0

the way it's really seems like a failure of direction of guidance of good decision making of it feels like this every man for themselves mentality and so the every man for themselves mentality the constantly having make decisions without any guidance the feeling like you're an island and then you're actually being an island right we don't have any of the things that get our resilience

6:17.0

activated it feels much like a perfect storm it's like what is that like exhaustion makes cowards of us all yes it's like we are so physically emotionally spiritually exhausted we are we are hope starved we are and then we are in the ecosystem of social interaction

...

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