Heather Havrilesky: Be Where You Are

Everything Happens with Kate Bowler

Everything Happens Studios

Health & Fitness, Religion & Spirituality, Society & Culture

4.8 • 4.7K Ratings

🗓️ 4 May 2021

⏱️ 39 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

How do we find “enough” in a life that keeps getting…. harder? Our lives are shrinking. We are shrunk by the pandemic or by illness or by age or by any number of losses. And it can be difficult to feel satisfaction and enjoyment again, especially in the midst of a self-help culture that tries to tell you “EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE.” In this episode, Kate speaks with writer and advice columnist Heather Havrilesky about finding contentment in our bodies, in our parenting, in our relationships, while living a life we didn’t choose. Sometimes we need a smoking appliance day (…that will make more sense when you listen). To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	I'm Kate Boehler and this is Everything Happens.
0:04.0	I'm a historian, author, aggressively fast walker, but lately in a world that promises endless
0:10.9	progress, even now in a pandemic, I've realized I just need to be a person.
0:18.4	It's hard to give up on the feeling that the life you want is just out of reach, if
0:23.7	only you tried.
0:26.0	Make this food, find that relationship, just get the kids graduated or the parents this
0:31.6	kind of care.
0:33.4	Only then will I feel different, better, whole.
0:39.3	But that's not the way this works.
0:42.1	When I was 35, I was diagnosed with stage war cancer, and here's the very fun thing
0:47.1	about that.
0:48.4	The world loves you better when you are shiny, when you are cheerful, when you still
0:53.7	believe that your best life now is right around the corner.
0:57.9	I've written multiple books on the history of the idea that you can always fix your life,
1:03.1	so I'm going to be the one to say it.
1:05.7	There are some things we can change and some things we can't, and it's okay that life
1:12.0	isn't always getting better.
1:14.7	We can have beauty and meaning, community and love, and we will need each other if we're
1:21.2	going to tell the truth.
1:23.4	Life is a chronic condition, and there's no cure for being human.
1:34.1	I used to be the kind of person who thought anything was possible.
1:38.1	It is an intoxicating story we tell ourselves.
	...

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