Healthy Ways to Handle Failure

Girlfriends (A Podcast for Catholic Women)

Danielle Bean

Kids & Family, Parenting, Religion & Spirituality

4.9 • 810 Ratings

🗓️ 25 June 2019

⏱️ 40 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Failure feels terrible. Maybe you didn’t get a job you applied for, maybe your idea for a school fundraiser was a total dud, or maybe you just got impatient and yelled at your kids. Again. When we fail, we are sometimes tempted to live in denial or drown our sorrows in unhealthy ways, but this week I want to invite you to spend some time thinking about healthy ways to respond to failure—so we can learn and grow from our experiences. See the full shownotes as ascensionpress.com/girlfriends Snippet from the Show “Sometimes when we fail, the temptation is to feel like you don’t have any control, but in any situation, you can choose how you react.” 1) Acknowledge how you feel. Don’t pretend it didn’t happen or that it doesn’t matter. If you are feeling angry or sad or embarrassed, allow yourself to fully experience that feeling without judgment. 2) Stop any negative coping. Avoid engaging in numbing behaviors like drinking or overeating. A little indulgence might be soothing, but make sure this is not your go-to for bad feelings. 3) Find helpful outlets. Find out what will help you process what you are feeling in a healthy way. Calling a friend or venting to your husband can be helpful. Or maybe go for a long drive or take a walk to be alone for a while. Of course prayer works here too! 4) Accept responsibility. Find out how you might have contributed to the failure. What did you do or not do that caused it? Don’t look to blame others. 5) Learn from it. Failure can help us to better understand the kind of people we are, the kind we want to be, or in what ways we still need to work on ourselves or gain new skills. What can you learn about yourself, about others, or about what your goals are and should be from your experience of failure? 6) Make a plan for the future. Do not stay there in your failure! Make a plan to apply for a new job, make a new friend, learn a new skill, or … whatever you decide comes next!

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Girlfriends, episode number 178. Healthy ways to handle failure.
0:08.8	Hello and welcome to girlfriends. I'm Danielle Bean. I'm a wife and a mom, and I am on a
0:14.3	mission to help you know your worth as a woman so you can find peace, balance, and joy and family
0:19.9	living. This week, we're talking about how to
0:22.2	handle it when we mess up. How can we handle failure in a healthy way? Let's get started.
0:42.3	Hey, girlfriends, how are you? Glad you're joining me for another episode of the Girlfriends Podcast. Always glad when we can connect here. Have you been? How's the start to your summer?
0:48.0	Here in New Hampshire, it feels like summer some days. We've had some summer weather. We've still
0:53.3	had a ton of rain. But it doesn't fully feel like summer because my kids, my two who go to high school, are still in school. I know. It's crazy. And some of you down south are like, what? We've been off of school for over a month. I know. And it's because we've had so many snow days, especially this year. They're going especially late. We usually do go well into June, but not quite this late. So looking forward to the kids' schedules shifting. And actually, it's starting to feel like a summer schedule around here. I absolutely love the summer.
1:25.1	Lisa Hendy and I recorded a podcast over at Catholic Mom, so you can
1:28.7	check it out. Maybe I'll put a link in the show notes for you of the Catholic Momcast talking about
1:33.1	summer to schedules shifting and sharing some ideas for ways to have an offline summer. And, you know,
1:39.7	whether or not you're choosing to unplug this summer or trying to use, you know, fewer screens or have
1:44.5	less screen time or get outdoors more with your kids. I think the summer is a great time to think about
1:51.6	what your goals are, to think about a project you might consider taking on because it's very
1:57.6	interesting that it's, you know, a set period of time, three months or so.
2:01.9	And it's kind of set apart culturally, especially if you have kids because they're not in school usually during the summer months or they might go to camp or, you know, family schedules change for the summertime.
2:11.7	So I find it's a helpful time to kind of think about what kind of work projects you might want to take on and what kind of goals you might want to set for the coming weeks. If you have ideas, things that are going on with you,
2:21.6	maybe you can inspire us. Maybe we should do an episode here at Girlfriends about plans for the
2:26.0	summer. I would love to do that. So anyway, send me an email, Danielle at Daniellebeen.com.
2:31.0	If you have ideas for a summer themed show or just let me know what's going on
2:36.1	in your world. I did get a ton of feedback, so I'm going to get to that at the end of the show.
2:40.0	I guess it's been a little while since I recorded a regular episode because last week I did that
	...

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