This is Hidden Brain. I'm Shankher Vedantam. I'm sorry. It's one of the simplest things to say and also one of the hardest.

That's especially true when we're apologizing to the most important people in our lives. When we've wronged a parent or a partner or a close friend,

working up the courage to make amends can sometimes feel really hard.

Why is that? Why do many of us find it difficult to apologize, especially to the people we love?

This week on Hidden Brain, we conclude our healing 2.0 series with a look at the psychology of apologies.

We'll consider the mental barriers that make it hard for us to acknowledge when we've done something wrong.

The changing cultural expectations are to acknowledge when we've done something wrong,

the changing cultural expectations around apologies,

and why it may be useful to think of an apology

as a gift. Think about the last time someone wronged you.

Did they apologize?

Now think about the last time you wronged someone else.

Did you apologize?

At the University of Queensland in Australia,

Tyler Okimoto studies the psychology of apologies.

He examines the transformative power of apologies

and what happens in our minds when we say I'm sorry

Tyler Okimoto welcome to Hidden Brain. Thank you Shankar glad to be here. I want to

take you back Tyler to the 2016 Rio Olympics. The star US swimmer Ryan

Lochte and other athletes said that they had been robbed at night by armed men. It turned out the story was only a cover for what really happened and that this is a

classic example of how we often react when we are accused of doing something bad.

Yeah, that's right. That's right. First reaction is deny, come up with an excuse, trying to

...