Welcome to the Daily Dad podcast, where we provide one lesson every single day to help you with your most important job, being a parent.

I'm Ryan Holiday, and I draw these lessons from ancient philosophy, modern psychology, practical wisdom,

and insights from parents just like you all over the world.

Thank you for listening, and we hope this helps.

You hear people talk about mom guilt, the feeling that moms get for not being perfect, not measuring up to

their own impossible standards or the impossible standards they think other moms have. Of course,

there's dad guilt too. All good parents feel like they're falling short, like they're not doing

enough, like they're not good enough. And this guilt is good in one sense. Certainly there are

selfish, obvious, oblivious parents who don't think about this or their kids much at all. But other than as a signal that you care, parental guilt is not much good for anything. Does imposter syndrome make you better at the office? No, it takes your eye off the ball. It's almost egotistical in its insecurity,

convincing a person that everyone is thinking about them. Parental guilt is like that. It doesn't

make you any better at an already tough job. Your kids hit you enough, literally and figuratively,

that you don't need to add self-flagellation to it. Seneca talks about how progress in philosophy is being

able to be a better friend to yourself. While as a parent, you've got to do the same thing,

a friend holds you accountable, can speak truth to you, but they do this with kindness,

they do this with encouragement, they like you, they support you. A person who makes you feel guilty,

who criticizes you constantly, who tells you'll never measure up, that you're screwing up.

They're not a friend. They're not someone you want to be around your kids. So why are you

letting them live in your head? Why are you doing this to yourself? I've told you guys this before, but I always love

getting my box of awesome every month from bespoke post. Last month I got this really cool

Japanese multi-purpose knife. I've gotten a hatchet

that I've used around my farm. I've gotten a sushi set. I've got this cool cocktail

mixing set. They're just always including really awesome stuff. No matter what you have going on this

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