Did I ever tell you guys about that time I had to talk to a little old lady about stealing my coffee creamer?

God.

Sadness.

It was the worst.

Okay.

Savage. I know. And I, and it's And truthfully, it's not like I cared, but. Well, sounds like you did. Well, let me tell you the story. So this was where I was sitting on the exact floor. And, you know, the key fob to get in, there's a certain people, only the people that actually sat on that floor. And, of course, the little old lady who was the receptionist. And so a lot of us had coffee creamer, and there wasn't a whole bunch of us on the floor. So I didn't care who used my coffee creamer. But most of the time, people would be like, hey, Jamie, I ran out, I used yours. I'm like, cool, no, no issue. Well, one day, I brought in a fresh new coffee creamer. I haven't even opened it. And I actually had orientation that morning, got busy, didn't have my cup. So after orientation, I stroll down to the kitchen and I go and I pick up my coffee creamer and I untwist the cap thinking I have to take off the foil, right?

Well, the foil's gone, and I was like, oh, God, I'm fucking tripping. I really thought that I

brought a new one this morning. I have had a busy morning. And then I realize it's more than

half gone. Half gone. In a morning? Yes. And I just brought in that morning. So I, I strolled down to my work bestie and I'm like, girl, what did you do? Because she, a lot of times she would use it. And she was like, what do you mean? I haven't even had coffee this morning. And I was like, half of my creamer is missing. Half of the bottle of a brand new, like, jug of creamer. And she was like, I didn't even use it.

What are you talking about? Why are you accusing me? Oh, my God. So anyway, I see in our fridge

this water bottle. She had taken an empty water bottle and filled it like a 16.9 ounce fluid ounce water bottle and filled it with my creamer. Half of my creamer. I'm not exaggerating. Yes. And so I saw it and I was like, no. So I opened it. I smelled it. And I love the sweet cream. I'm a sweet cream girly. So I smelled it. I'm like, oh, it smells like a small cream. And then I opened my, like, a little detective.

And I opened my actual creamer. And I smell it. And I'm like, and then I do a little taste test. Yep. I sure did. I did a little tastest. Yeah. Finger. Of the, well, I actually. Wip your finger. I actually dipped a knife because I couldn't find a stir.

So I did plastic knife.

You know, whatever.

And I did plastic knife. You know,

whatever. And I dipped it in hers, licked it, dipped it in mine. I'm like, sure fucking enough.

Can you believe, though, that I just dipped a knife and licked it into a mystery substance in a water bottle?

Like, that's sketch.

What was I thinking?

Anyway.

But at least you did a dignity to her by dipping hers first and then yours. You could have done the opposites. I could have. But you were on the search for the truth. Oh, yeah. That's a quest. A quest. Nothing will stop you. Then I was like, okay, well, I feel bad. This little old lady, she only worked like 10 hours a week.

She sat at our receptionist desk, really just sat there. was like, okay, well, I feel bad. This little old lady, she only worked like 10 hours a week.

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