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Your Undivided Attention

Esther Perel on Artificial Intimacy

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Center for Humane Technology

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4.81.5K Ratings

🗓️ 17 August 2023

⏱️ 44 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

AI is harming our relationships, warns acclaimed psychotherapist Esther Perel. What would it look like for technology to strengthen our social bonds, rather than depriving us of the nuance that allows us to connect?

Transcript

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0:00.0

I go from one technology conference to another.

0:08.1

I can tell you the word relationship is never mentioned.

0:12.0

Never mentioned.

0:13.2

There are moonshots about everything, environment, education, health, transportation, you name

0:18.8

it.

0:19.8

Nobody ever is looking at a moonshot for relationships.

0:23.4

And yet all these technologies are profoundly affecting how we relate to each other, how

0:29.6

we relate to ourselves.

0:32.0

That's Famous Psychotherapist Esther Perel, who is the New York Times bestselling author

0:35.9

of the books, The State of Affairs, and Mating and Captivity.

0:40.2

She's had celebrated TED Talks that have garnered more than 20 million views, and is also

0:44.0

the host of the two popular podcasts, Where Should We Begin, and How's Work?

0:49.1

And Esther and I have been going back and forth for the last ten years about how technology

0:52.8

has been distorting the way that human beings form relationships, and distorting the way

0:57.2

that we gain or lose intimacy.

0:59.6

And what we're about to get into is how do we deal with technology that is distorting

1:04.2

our relationships in our intimacy?

1:05.7

What would it look like for technology to foster meaningful connection and meaningful

1:09.9

intimacy, and distinguish between the fake kind and the real kind?

1:14.3

Who are we to say what fake and real actually is?

1:20.3

So why would we do an episode just about relationships?

1:25.2

In the AI dilemma talk that Aizenai gave, we talked about how loneliness is a national

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