How do you pass up the opportunity to spit blood and Joan Baez's face?

I've read Mark Twain. I've read Huckleberry Finn. I think I earned the right to go out of the internet and see a guy get a chainsaw on the face. Dude, my dad was drunk and my mom was dealing with it. Guess what? I get raised by a lucky monster.

My con looks like it's been in a hockey flage., my stupidity. It's at the speed of goddamn light.

I got a bunch of the clocks.

Hey, what's happened?

I'm Mike Schmidt, 40-year-old boy podcast.

Look at the enthusiasm I come out of the gate with, man.

I'm feeling good.

I'm feeling happy.

I'm feeling spry.

That's right, I feel spry.

Not to be confused with spree. I don't feel like hard candy that ripped off sweet tarts. I feel spry,

which means springy, which means I feel like an old man born anew. But I felt like spree,

I'd feel like a chewy hard candy that I ate all the time in study hall. When bands were selling candy,

not all bands. I mean, our band at my high school, not band. What if bands's dead. Bands just came. You know, I bought candy ones from the band Boston.

Oh,

it was delicious.

Baked beans,

certainly it was.

I bought some candy

from Mario Speedwagon.

Well,

...