Episode 451: How Not to Be Angry at Your Mother with Sarah

Over It And On With It

Christine Hassler

Mental Health, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Education

4.8 • 1.7K Ratings

🗓️ 15 May 2024

⏱️ 29 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

In this insightful episode of "Over It and On with It," host Christine Hasler explores a deeply resonant topic—navigating and resolving anger towards one's mother. Our guest, Sarah, shares her struggles with frequent negative interactions with her mother, which are often marred by impatience and rudeness, despite her mother's consistent kindness. This conversation delves into the root causes of Sarah's feelings, the broader implications of parental relationships, and practical steps for healing and self-nurturing.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Do you have unresolved anger or resentment towards a parent that affects your current interactions?
How have your childhood experiences shaped your emotional responses to your parents today?
Are you able to meet your emotional needs independently, or do you find yourself seeking fulfillment from your parents?

Guest Insights:

Sarah recognizes her anger stems from past unmet needs during her childhood, exacerbated by her mother's inability to protect her from an abusive situation.
The conversation reveals Sarah's desire for her mother to push back against her, reflecting her unresolved needs for assertiveness and protection.

Aha Moments:

Realizing the necessity of mourning the 'ideal' parent and accepting the limitations of what one's parents can provide.
Understanding the importance of becoming the source of comfort and security that one sought from their parents.

How to Get Over It:

Embrace self-mothering by acknowledging and nurturing one's inner child.
Implementing practical exercises like visualizations where Sarah comforts her

younger self, promoting healing.

Establishing boundaries and new emotional frameworks that do not rely on parental validation.

Sponsor:

Caraway Cookware: Non-toxic cookware that combines modern aesthetics with functionality. Special discounts available for listeners at carawayhome.com/overit.

Social Media Info:

Follow Christine on Instagram @ChristineHassler
Tweet your insights to Christine @ChristineHassler on Twitter
Join us next week for another insightful episode where we help you get over it and on with the life you love.

Transcript

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0:00.0	This is episode 451.
0:02.3	How not to be angry at your mother with Sarah.
0:06.7	Welcome to Over It and On With It.
0:08.9	I'm your host, Christine Hasler,
0:10.6	and for over a decade I've been a life coach, speaker, and author.
0:14.0	Each week you'll hear me work directly with a caller as I coach them through a goal
0:17.7	they want to accomplish or an obstacle they may be facing.
0:20.3	I'll provide a blend of practical and spiritual advice as well as tangible actions you can apply to your own life.
0:26.0	Now let's get on with the episode.
0:32.0	Hi everybody welcome back to the show well this seems like an appropriate
0:36.8	episode to be airing after Mother's Day weekend I know that day can bring up a
0:41.5	lot of stuff for a lot of different reasons so I hope that you
0:46.2	remember to be very kind to yourself on that day and every day actually and this topic about anger at mom I mean it can be applied to
0:57.0	anyone but the mother-daughter wound is a big one for many people and as a mother of a daughter myself it's something that I am
1:08.0	very aware of and doing my best to create as healthy as I can a mother-daughter relationship.
1:17.0	And it's a little easier right now because she's only two years old.
1:21.0	And as we all know as we get older you know we as children or we as
1:27.5	parents and life continues to life we can either have more tools to do better or we can get more ingrained and enmeshed in our own stuff and oftentimes a parent in this case we're talking about a mother, is so programmed, for lack of a better word, by her own patterns, that it impacts every aspect of her life, particularly her mothering.
1:56.0	You know, one of the things that I've said so often on the show, and I think I say in this episode to Sarah,
2:02.0	is there's two deaths of our parents we need to
2:03.7	grieve their actual physical death which sometimes is easier than the
2:09.2	death of the ideal, the death of who we wish them to be because when we do then we have to take on
	...

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