Episode 387: Should I Still Talk to My Ex?

The Hardcore Self Help Podcast with Duff the Psych

Robert Duff, Ph.D.

Health & Fitness, Robertduff, Education, Duffthepsych, Mental Health, Psychology, Selfhelp, Advice, Drduff

4.6 • 1K Ratings

🗓️ 1 March 2024

⏱️ 24 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Hello friends!

In this episode, we delve into a deeply personal and complex question that touches on the lasting impact of past relationships, the nuances of friendship, and the boundaries within a current, happy marriage. A listener shares their experience of not being able to stop thinking about an ex, despite being happily married and having no desire to rekindle a romantic relationship. They discuss the significance of this past relationship during a pivotal time in their life and ponder whether they should attempt to cultivate a friendship or strive to move on completely.

We explore the importance of acknowledging the role this person played in their life, while also considering the potential implications for their current relationship. The conversation includes practical advice on navigating these feelings, communicating with both the spouse and the ex, and setting healthy boundaries. We also discuss the potential for "relationship drift" and the importance of being honest with oneself about the true motivations and possible outcomes of re-establishing contact.

As always, you can send me questions to [email protected] and find the full show notes for this episode at http://duffthepsych.com/episode387.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey everybody in this episode I keep things pretty short and sweet I have one
0:04.0	listener question question is from somebody who is
0:07.2	wondering about how they should treat interacting with their ex from over a
0:12.4	decade ago but circumstances are different now and they're married.
0:15.8	So we talk about boundaries in a relationship, communication, all sorts of things like that.
0:21.3	If you would like to send in a question for the show to be
0:23.9	considered for a future episode please don't forget you can email me at duff the site
0:28.7	at gmail.com or you can go to duff the site dot com and use the contact
0:32.3	form there.
0:33.0	All right, let's go. This is the Hardcore Self-Help Podcast. I'm your host Dr. Robert Deaf.
0:49.0	I'm a Clinical Psychologist and a Self-Help author from Southern California. My goal is to make mental health
0:54.6	content for real people just like you. And in this show I answer your questions
0:58.9	or dive deep into topics related to life, psychology, mental health, relationships, and more.
1:04.7	Please be aware that sometimes I use some spicy language, and I also don't shy away from
1:09.4	sensitive topics, but I will try to give you a content warning whenever it's relevant.
1:13.4	So if all this sounds good to you, let's get started.
1:16.2	All right, hello friends of all varieties.
1:20.8	This is episode 387. Thank you for joining me. I have a relatively
1:26.1	short and sweet episode today. I'm just going to be doing one question here.
1:31.2	Your boy is tired this week. It's been a very busy week and I had to do some, you know, meetings and actually some brave stuff today. I talked with my employer about some important stuff which took
1:46.1	a little bit of emotional lead up and all of that so I think that took it out of me a little
1:51.0	bit and I've just been kind of running out of fast pace.
	...

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