Good morning everybody and welcome to the highlight of human civilization and possibly aliens.

It's called coffee with Scott Adams and there's never been a better time.

And we got news for you like news all over the place.

You can be saturated with funny absurd news. It's the best kind.

And if you'd like that experience to go to levels that well people say can never be matched.

All you need is a cup of mugger, glass of tanker, gel, and a canteen jugger flask of vessel of any kind.

Fill it with your favorite liquid. I like coffee.

Enjoyed me now for the unparalleled pleasure that don't mean anything to the day of the thing that makes everything better.

It's called the simultaneous sippin' happens now.

Go.

Oh.

Well, if you're on Twitter you should know that I just just just now tweeted a clip of me from my man cave explaining how to predict the future of the news using nothing but a timpool hat.

And your finger. You'll need a finger and a timpool hat.

And you too can predict the future of the news. I just tweeted that if you want to see it.

But don't leave. Don't leave. Stay here now. Later you can go look for that.

All right. Apparently Mayor Jacob Fry or Fray in Minneapolis.

He's telling the police to not arrest people who have mushrooms.

And I guess everybody is realizing that mushrooms are going to save the world.

We're going to fix all your mental illnesses and make you happy.

So that's a little sign of goodness. We're going to ease into the hard news as we got some hard news.

And by heart I mean funny. But it's still hard. Hard and funny.

Yeah. I've been described that way. But that's another story. Don't let's not talk about that.

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