Hey guys, my name is John Kim. I'm a licensed therapist and life coach putting

self betterment into a shot class because let's face it who's got that much time

these days. I come unpolished, unrehearsed, on purpose.

If you're looking for more of a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place.

I talk a lot about attracting versus chasing and how to get yourself into an attracting state.

I actually have an audio course coming out in a few months I'm working on it and one of the topics I wanted to talk about today has to do with how to put yourself into more of an attracting state and you know since this is a 10 minute

podcast I'll do the broad strokes and I'll go I go deeper into it in my audio

course so look out for that but how you treat yourself is extremely important.

This is where the road forks and if you treat yourself poorly,

then you're going to be in a chasing state.

So put a bookmark there, let me share a quick story.

I had a session today with a client who grew up with a dad who kept calling him a piece of shit, never praised him,

and then mom divorced dad and then he had a stepdad who physically beat him.

Mom never protected him.

And then he grew up and now as an adult, unhappy, grayed out, totally disconnected with his body, doesn't have any

kind of sense of self-esteem or worth. And previously previously have been in toxic relationships because of this

belief that he doesn't matter that he he's not valuable, right?

And so if you believe that you don't have worth,

you're always going to position yourself

into being in a chasing state, right,

where you are powerless and what has power are the people around you that you seek approval from or you put a lot of weight on ability, performance, things that are contingent, right?

So you start to tie your true value to the external.

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