This week I talk about why we struggle with decision-making and I explain why the early stages of dating is about guesswork.

I'm Natalie Lou, a writer based in southeast London who is

dedicated to helping people to improve their emotional and relationship literacy.

Let's kick this off.

Jesus, I can't believe it's the end of January already.

Hands up, who started after the year, all gung-ho, with all sorts of plans and resolutions. I'm sure that's a

hell of a lot of us. I know so many people who said that they were doing dry

January. Some stuck it out. Others like my husband blew it all in one evening. I also know people who

have had to exercise, to eat less sugar, or to break a toxic pattern. While some of us

will note what we did do and some of us will endeavor to continue to strive for the things

that we want to change.

There is a portion of us who will decide not to bother.

This is okay when it's something minor, but if not doing it is

really about feeling as if we needn't bother because we've messed up a clean

year, it's important to get some perspective on it.

We can come into a year saying this year it's going to be different I'm'm going to make it happen. It's a new year and a new me.

I'm going to be optimistic. I'm going to attract a different life.

Next thing, as life tends to do, something goes awry because when I say it goes awry it doesn't

fit the picture that we had in our head. And then we think, well, that's it. I've botched up January, so that's it for me.

It's the end of 2016 for me, I might as well just go back to what I already know.

This is really unfair. We can't write off time that hasn't happened yet. This is really, really important.

Like we are in flow with time or the time, whatever time is supposed to be because it is like sort of like an ever-flowing thing.

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