This is feminist wellness and I'm your host, nurse practitioner, functional medicine expert and life coach Victoria Albina. I'll be full heart. Welcome my love. Let's get started.

Hello hello my love. I hope this finds you doing so well. This week I am thrilled as always to share one of the episodes that I have

gotten the most positive feedback around, an episode that I keep hearing from you all

has really been supportive and that's

episode 64 letting go of resentment. So if you are a human whose brain tends to run

towards cod dependent perfectionist and people-pleasing thought

habits and this episode is for you. I know that resentment was such a huge part of

being miserable in my own life, of well shooting the second arrow and feeling a lot of suffering from my human interactions based on my own thoughts about them.

You know, if a roommate didn't take the trash out or my partner didn't do a chore they said they would do if someone said something in a tone I didn't like. My sweet little ego would pop up because it

thought it was protecting me, right? That's what our egos and our protector parts do.

They make things about us and that is the core of resentment is taking things personally

getting your ego involved when someone else is just mameling along right they're just

humaning along in their human life and they may forget to do something, they may say something in a tone that doesn't work for you or activate something within you and that's when resentment builds, right? I resent that he did that. I resent, they didn't do that.

Resentment comes from taking it personally. So if we back up and we look at the core wounding that leads us to codipendant and people-pleasing

thinking in particular, perfectionist thinking as well, It's really that story, that we, that I, that you are not valid,

worthy, whole, and here's the center part of it, right? The core of it. We are not worthy of being taken care of by others.

We are not worthy of being treated well, right? We worry that we're just not going to get that in life. And so we fight tooth and nail for it. And one of the ways we fight is by holding a grudge internally, right? There's that old saying that a resentment is like drinking

poison and hoping the other person dies and that's what we do, particularly when

for whatever reason systemic oppression oppression what we learned from our

conditioning our socialization particularly for humans who were assigned

female at birth were raised as girls and women in this complex culture, right, we're taught that we're not worthy.

We're not worthy of being heard, listen to, our opinions aren't valid, that we should

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