Ep. 1091 - America the Delusional
The Andrew Klavan Show
The Andrew Klavan Show
4.8 • 22.7K Ratings
🗓️ 6 August 2022
⏱️ 102 minutes
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| 0:00.0 | Ah, embarrassment. There's nothing quite like it. |
| 0:03.2 | And our Sprits do it best, but I'm here to offer you a safe space. |
| 0:07.6 | This is the place you can come to share all of those stories of past embarrassment that still keep you up at night. |
| 0:12.8 | Let's find a way to laugh at them together and then move on. |
| 0:15.8 | Remember, there's no judgement here. |
| 0:17.8 | So join me in my brand new podcast and finally put those memories to bed. |
| 0:21.8 | Jack Whitehall's Safe Space. |
| 0:23.8 | Only on Audible. Listen now. |
| 0:26.0 | Subscription required, see audible.co.uk for terms. |
| 0:30.0 | CDC officials and other Democrat quacks are scrambling to come up with a new name for monkeypox that won't stigmatize promiscuous homosexuals who have anal sex with multiple strangers and then break out in postures so that everyone knows they've degraded themselves making them literally stigmatized. |
| 0:47.6 | Monkeys would also like to have the disease renamed so they aren't associated with those people. |
| 0:52.2 | Monkey Spokesman, Jojo the Monkey, told reporters, quote, calling this disease monkeypox as offensive, not just to simmians, but to animals all the way down the evolutionary chain. |
| 1:02.0 | Sure, we throw X-Cerman at one another and make indecisurable EE noises like a bunch of idiots, but we're not stupid and uncivilized enough to hold orgies in San Francisco. |
| 1:11.0 | I personally have been faithful to the same sexual partner for 15 years now. |
| 1:15.0 | And sure, partly that's because I'm locked in a cage with her, but if the Supreme Court gave me the right to get married, I'd do it in a minute. |
| 1:20.8 | Unless I could get out of this cage, then I'd move to San Francisco. |
| 1:24.2 | Unquote. |
| 1:25.2 | A Democrat spokesman, also named Jojo the Monkey, explained the party's policy to a classroom of five-year-olds saying, quote, |
| 1:31.8 | we must not allow a disease that largely spreads through a debaiced and unhealthy lifestyle to become an impediment to promiscuous idiots who wanted to base themselves and destroy their health. |
| 1:41.6 | Otherwise, people might start to develop self-respect and personal discipline and there'd be no one left to vote for Democrats. |
| 1:47.6 | And by the way, kids, if anyone would like to further explore alternative sexualities, see me after class. |
| 1:52.6 | Unquote. |
... |
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