We’ve all been hit by it. It seemingly comes out of nowhere—a misunderstanding or argument we never saw coming. One moment you’re having a discussion, the next you're blindsided by resistance, vitriol, or passive-aggressive blowback. Where did it come from? Why did something small suddenly feel so personal? Here’s the truth: it’s rarely about the thing—it’s about what the thing represents. Control. Trust. Identity. Relevance. Fear. A loss of autonomy. There’s always something else simmering under the surface. And if you want to be effective in high-stakes conversations or high-pressure environments, you have to be able to read those underlying signals, not just bulldoze with logic. In this episode Brett unpacks exactly how to do that and covers: How to diagnose the real reason behind someone’s resistance Why linking your message to their character is more effective than chasing compliance How to foster autonomy by making it feel like their idea Why perception, not logic, is the real engine of influence and leadership What drives people to defend their identity and internal narrative at all costs 🎯 This episode dives deep into what drives behavior, yours and theirs. Take our free quiz at artofcoaching.com/whatdrivesyou to uncover what really makes people tick. Folsom Brand Builder Are you a coach, entrepreneur, or speaker who wants to turn your expertise into something that actually pays the bills? Whether you’ve never made a dollar or just brought in your first million, Brand Builder is for you! Spend two interactive days in Folsom, CA, getting crystal clear on your messaging, attracting the right clients, and building a business that scales. You’ll leave with clarity, confidence, and a framework that lets you do what you love—on your terms. 📍Folsom, CA –  August 8-9 To register or get more details, visit:  artofcoaching.com/brand-builder-25 Private Growth Retreat Stuck? Burnt out? Just need space to think? Come spend a day or two at AOC HQ with Brett for a private retreat built entirely around you. Strategy sessions, time outside, good food, and honest conversation—plus maybe a lift in the garage gym. This is where you quiet the noise, organize the chaos, map your next move, and leave with clarity and confidence. Email [email protected] and let us know you're interested in a private retreat and we’ll work out a date. Writer’s Workshop – Put Pen to Paper Want to write a book but don’t know where to start? Brett self-published Conscious Coaching—and now he’s working with one of the world’s biggest publishers for his next one. Either one-on-one or in a small-group, he’ll share what worked, a whole lot of what didn’t, and how you can overcome the grind that writing can be, outline your ideas into a well-crafted message, and get it into the hands of those who need it most. Email [email protected] mention the Writer’s Workshop you heard about on the podcast and let’s start filling the page! Related Episodes: E202 | Why Facts and Logic Don't Change Our Minds  Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb