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For The Love With Jen Hatmaker Podcast

Dr. Rick Hanson on Confrontation as a Path to Well-Being

For The Love With Jen Hatmaker Podcast

Jen Hatmaker

Relationships, Society & Culture

4.66.3K Ratings

🗓️ 7 February 2024

⏱️ 63 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

We’ve got another empowering episode in our Facing Your Fears series, and boy, do we have a fear that hits close to home for a lot of us – confronting those tough conversations we'd rather dance around than dive into. If the thought of confrontation has you squirming in your seat, you’re in good company. But what if we flipped the script and viewed these moments of truth-telling as acts of honor, steps towards healing and improvement? Jen invites the insightful Dr. Rick Hanson, celebrated psychologist, acclaimed author, and speaker extraordinaire, to dissect our dread of difficult chats. Dr. Hanson is on a mission to transform confrontation into a finely honed skill that fosters lasting well-being and better relationships. His wisdom will not only challenge your perceptions but provide you with the practical tools to embrace these crucial conversations with confidence. Don't miss out on this transformative discussion that could redefine how you approach confrontation, making your connections healthier, and you, happier. * * * Thought-Provoking Quotes: “Research shows that relationships are made from interactions. The gradual weight of interactions, for better or worse, over time shapes the relationship, and interactions are built from little turn-taking back and forth.” - Dr. Rick Hanson “It's so important, these foundations to care for yourself deep down. What are your aims in your relationships, and can you build up your sense that you deserve people to treat you well? That's good. If you have choices and they don't treat you well, it's your right to shrink the size of the relationship.” - Dr. Rick Hanson “[When communicating with difficult people] know what you want. Then, as much as you can, try to boil it down to something you can ask for that's clear and specific if that's what you really want. Then second, ask for it. Find a way to say what you want.” - Dr. Rick Hanson “If you're going to have that conflict, get prepared; talk about it with some people. Get some advice. Write out keywords or sentences or phrases or just kind of work out a rough draft to clarify things.” - Dr. Rick Hanson“We don't have total control over the love that we receive. However, we do have control over the compassion, kindness, friendliness, respect, and love that we flow outward. So getting in touch with the heart is a neurologically, and biologically grounded way to help yourself feel less scared before you go into confrontation.” - Dr. Rick Hanson “Interactions often go sideways when they speed up. Simply, notice in your mind when you start accelerating and you start talking faster. You must deliberately slow down, sit back, and exhale.” - Dr. Rick Hanson Resources Mentioned in This Episode: Mother Nurture by Dr. Rick Hanson Nonviolent Communication by Marshall B. Rosenberg PhD and Deepak Chopra Making Great Relationships by Dr. Rick Hanson Guest’s Links: Dr. Hanson’s Website Dr. Hanson’s Facebook Dr. Hanson’s Twitter Dr. Hanson’s Instagram Connect with Jen! Jen’s website Jen’s Instagram Jen’s Twitter Jen’s Facebook Jen’s YouTube The For the Love Podcast is a production of Four Eyes Media, presented by Audacy. Four Eyes Media: https://www.iiiimedia.com/ To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

This episode is brought to you by better help.

0:02.4

Let's talk relationships,

0:03.7

relationships with your family, your work people, your friends, significant other, and yourself.

0:08.9

What is your relationship report card?

0:10.8

And some areas of life chugging along great while others are on the struggle bus

0:15.2

therapy can be a place to work any challenges you face in relationships I know it was

0:19.7

for me therapy equips you to work through hard times to get to better times and it also helps you learn about yourself as an individual and in relationship.

0:28.5

So if you're thinking of starting therapy, you have better help a try. It's entirely online.

0:34.0

Designed to be convenient, flexible to your schedule.

0:37.0

Simply fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with the licensed therapist.

0:40.6

And you could even switch therapists anytime for no additional charge.

0:45.6

Become your own soulmate, whether you're looking for one or not.

0:49.6

Visit BetterHelp.com slash For the Love today to get 10% off your first month.

0:55.4

That's Better Help, H-E-L-P.com slash For the Love.

0:59.6

This is a reminder to all my gearlies out there starting 2024 single what's meant for you

1:03.9

won't pass you by and showing yourself a little love can go a long way and

1:07.2

maybe a match on bumble sometimes it can feel like there's a lot of pressure to

1:10.6

constantly better yourself but just be everybody's journey looks

1:13.7

different and sometimes you just need to appreciate where you are right now.

1:18.6

Hi everybody Jen Hatmaker here your host of the For the Love podcast welcome to the show. Oh man. I just finished today's interview and now my brain's just

1:31.4

bizzing absolutely buzzing such a good hour. It just evaporated for me like it was over before it started because it was so interesting and packed.

1:43.0

We're in a series called For the Love of Facing Your Fears,

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