I'm the cool dad. That's, that's my thing.

I know now what I can offer you that no one else can. Complete and undependent.

I'm a man. I'm sensitive. I need to feel loved. I need to be desired.

Yelling is the only part of being a father that I enjoy.

Welcome to dear old dads, the podcast. It's not sure where to store its bong. I'm Tom Curry. I'm joined as always by Thomas Smith and Eli Bosnick. Hello, gentlemen. Hello, gentlemen. Welcome. It's me,

Willie Wonka, and I'm here to tell you a poop story. What is happening, right? Is this

been I teased at the end of the last thing? Join me for a poop. We have no idea what's happening

either. Well, also the non-patrons also don't know what's going on. That's right. I have a boop story for you. And it's not the thing I teased at the last patron episode. But it does have to do with the last episode. Oh. Now, gentlemen, I think Guy talk, get ready for some guy talk

Get it in a new guide talk!

I think we've all had a little sprinkle when we tinkle,

little edge around the bowl,

and as good society, members of society,

we all know if you sprinkle when you tinkle,

please be neat, wipe the seat.

Of course.

So I would like to share with you the horror, the experience of being my wife. That's right. I'm here to give you a little inside scoop as to what it's like to be my wife. So we're recording our last episode moments ago. It's last week to you, listener. But for us, it was mere moments ago. Yeah, my balls are

still intact right now, by the way. His balls are still intact as of this, as you're recording this, but his balls have been gone for a week. You've all stolen all the loads you want, and it's miles away. It was, yeah, it was a good, uh, it was a good 24 hours. So, we record this and Anna texts me while we're recording and I have a way that I can see text messages on my computer because I have Apple everything.

And she's like, hey, how's your stomach doing?

And I'm like, it's okay.

And she's like, did you miss the bowl?

Oh, my God.

Oh, no.

...