Chronic Complaining

This Jungian Life Podcast

Joseph Lee, Deborah Stewart, Lisa Marchiano

Jungian, Mental Health, Health & Fitness, Psychology, Dreams, Jung, Relationships, Selfhelp, Society & Culture, Psychoanalysis

4.8 • 1.7K Ratings

🗓️ 19 September 2019

⏱️ 67 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

DREAM WITH US, and we’ll teach you how to interpret them!⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Complaining is universal, perhaps, like gossiping, one of the first uses to which developed language was put. Overall, a complaint can refer to a perceived legal injustice, medical symptom, or other personally painful matter. The chronic complainer feels a lack of agency, and implicitly pleads for emotional support and/or effective action from another. A complaint may therefore range from a request for empathic engagement to an effort to assign responsibility to others. Listeners have a felt sense of a complaint’s legitimacy; we resonate to injustice and its reparation in the tale of The Goose Girl. We feel exasperation with the heroine’s petulant entitlement in the tale of The Princess and the Pea, and take satisfaction in the punishment of greed in The Fisherman and His Wife. A chronic complaint is a call to identify and understand an underlying problem rather than externalizing it.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to this Jungian life. Three good friends and Jungian analysts, Lisa Marchiano,
0:07.0	Deborah Stewart and Joseph Lee, invite you to join them for an intimate and honest conversation
0:12.0	that brings a psychological perspective to important issues of the day.
0:17.0	I'm Lisa Marchiano, and I'm a Jungian analyst in Philadelphia. I'm Joseph Lee, and I'm a Jungian analyst in Philadelphia.
0:22.5	I'm Joseph Lee and I'm a Jungian analyst in Virginia Beach, Virginia.
0:27.5	I'm Deborah Stewart, a Jungian analyst on Cape Cod.
0:36.6	Hello and welcome to this Jungian life once again. And today we're going to deal with an
0:43.2	altogether human phenomenon that I would certainly put my chips down on that everyone has engaged
0:50.9	in. And that is the issue of chronic complaining. Complaining that is chronic
0:58.0	is like having a squeaky door that never gets fixed, but continues to bother us. It's not so
1:06.5	serious often that it's really a disaster, but it keeps on coming back and keeps on coming back.
1:14.2	And we seem to, in complaining chronically about the issue, lack the power or the authority
1:21.8	to actually do something about it. It goes into the interpersonal realm. We need another person to listen to us.
1:31.1	Complaining can range from being a real complaint of the soul to something that other people
1:38.1	might consider pretty incidental. I'm aware of how good it can feel to complain.
1:46.6	And that it can be this sort of, oh, I don't know, you can just really revel in it.
1:52.0	And it can kind of be a social sport.
1:55.7	Complaining with other people can be a way of bonding.
1:58.8	I'm thinking about maybe being in a relatively new situation with
2:03.0	people that you don't know very well. It can be fairly simple to turn to the person next to you and
2:08.2	complain about the weather or some other deficiency in your environment. It can wind up being
2:15.6	a point of connection with others that feels like an easy
	...

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