Who really knows you?

I mean, who really knows you?

I'm shocked by how many couples I counsel,

who don't get each other at all.

I mean, woof.

And as I often say, if you pick the wrong person,

there's no way to repair that.

But please come to therapy and pay me.

But if you'd rather start off by picking the right partner,

then I suggest using the sponsor of today's episode,

eHarmony, the dating app that helps people find someone

who gets you.

Honestly, your alternatives to find true love are not good.

Sliding into DMs, who even knows what that means.

Snapchatting your crush.

Again, these are elusive words that no one understands.

But eHarmony makes things simple with their compatibility

quiz.

You can actually find a match looking

for what you want, someone to sweep you off

into a majestic dazzling romance.

Or someone who will always do the dishes

...