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Why does the Santa's think Trump can't fix everything in six months?

That's five months and 29 days more than it took five months to screw it up.

If anyone says Hunter and I had an economic intercourse with China, my response is that

it's not what she said.

Brandon Stumplin and Bumlin at the Air Force Academy yesterday provides the greatest metaphor

for just how far this country has fallen and prestige in the world stage too.

Thanks for calling the domestic terrorism hotline at the Department of Homeland Security.

How can I help you today?

Yeah, um, there's a sandbag on my front desk.

Can you send somebody over here?

Thanks.

I'm falling and I can't get up.

Who needs life alert when you've got the secret service?

Every night at bedtime, Joe Biden asked his wife, Jill, to read him his favorite nursery rod.

Ring around, Rosie, pocket ball, pose, these ashes, ashes, we all fall down.

That was your last chump line message.

Thank you for calling HowWeCars.

You chump.

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