Hey ladies and gentlemen. This is one of these impromptu little audio podcasts that many

podcasts that I'm doing now that I want to substack that I wasn't doing before that are

generally only going to be available for paying subscribers, but I'm going to just put

this one up for everybody. As you know, if you subscribe to my substack whether paying

or not, a friend of mine died about a year ago in September, but I just found out a couple

of nights ago. I talked about it a little bit in the monthly newsletter I just sent out.

Anyway, his name was Chip and when I say he died 11 months ago and I just found out,

obviously we weren't in touch at this point. He was one of my best friends in high school.

And it's a weird thing. I have to say it's a weird thing because my life has not changed

at all. He was not present in my life other than as an idea and a memory or a collection

of memories. And yet knowing that he's not out there living and breathing changes something

for me, I feel different. It's like a volcano erupted on the other side of the world. I

can't hear it. I can't smell it, but somehow I feel it. I think one of the reasons I feel

it is that of all the people I've known, he is one of the most, how do I say this? He

sort of embodies a life force in a way in my consciousness. I'll be talking about him

in the present tense here because I guess I still haven't wrapped my head around the

necessity of using the past tense when I talk about him. But also because my memories

are present. As I just said, nothing's really changed for me in any concrete way. It's

all conceptual. But in any case, I thought I'd say a few words about him. I don't know if

this has any value for you at all or maybe I'm just doing it for myself. I've never

understood this. Those people who write a peon to their marriage on Instagram when it's

their anniversary. I met you 27 years ago and you're the best thing that's ever happened

...