Welcome to the Total Soccer Show and our review of Champions League match day three.

T'was a match day where Rees fleeced Milan, where the officials didn't have any fans among the Catalan's,

where Bayern were flying, where Lopetecki saw his job conclude, no thanks to a dude named Jude,

and where Erling Harlan kept it lean by only bringing his season goal tally to 19.

Yikes. My name's Ryan Bailey, here with slightly better judgment than the referees in the

Inter versus Barser game is one Taylor Rockwell. Hello, Taylor. I mean, that's high pressure.

You don't know what kind of calamities I might be causing in this recording session. You never know Ryan Bailey, but I appreciate you setting the stage. Indeed. I mean, a low bar is what you're going to get there, I suppose, Tatea. I'm just going to like overtalk when Graham wants to talk. I'm going to like disagree at random points. I'm going to insist we talk about a game that nobody has notes for.

I'm just going to create chaos because that's what I think VAR did pretty well in that game. Wonderfully so, Tate, and we'll get to that very shortly, but not before we introduce. See, I'm doing it already. I'm doing it already. Oh, he's done it. He's done it. Joining us, Mr. Interruptor and myself is a man who welcomes our new overlords Napoli.

Is that right, Graham Rutherman? Absolutely, I do. I mean, we've got no choice at this point. It feels like even if I don't welcome them, they're going to take over the world anyway. They are indeed. They're quite terrifying at the moment. We shall get to them later on in the show as well. But joining us a man with the grace and poise of a Leon O'Messie first-time hit, Joe Lowry. Hello, sir. Oh, that's the highest compliment I could ever hope to receive. That hit from Messi was so good over the weekend. I believe with that goal, he became the first player in Champions like history to score against 40 different

teams in the Champions League 40. That is so many different teams, given that it's basically

the same group, relatively speaking, at least most of it. Basically as many as an MLS.

Right. It's, I mean, almost, great. Almost. Let's not go carried away here. It was a beautiful

goal and Messi continues to be just incredible, as always.

40 is so many teams, indeed, Joe. It is in fact 40 teams. It is. That's many.

So many. So many indeed. And we should get to Mr. Messi and his PSG ilk shortly as well.

But before we get to the action, we're doing a live show, everybody. In case you haven't heard,

we are coming to New York for the start of the live show, everybody. In case you haven't heard, we are coming to

New York for the start of the World Cup, Sunday, November 20th. Please come and see us at Littlefield,

Brooklyn. It is not a field. It's not particularly little. It is a lovely indoor venue where

our cohort Graham pointed out that both David Cross and James Acaster have done stand-up sets.

So, Graham, a lot of pressure for you to be hilarious when we do little. Well, I'm planning on blowing myself at Littlefield

when we go to Tobias Fianke joke there for anyone who's watched that show. Just don't do it

...