Welcome to the Total Soccer Show and our review of the Champions League's semifinal second legs in Villarreal versus Liverpool and Real Madrid versus Man City.

I'm afraid we had some pretty dull affairs. Very little happened, not much to see, certainly not to the most drilling European semifinal conclusions we ever seen.

Nope, nope, nope, nope. Thank goodness I say for UEFA's plans to get rid of these boring, two-legged Champions League hit for semifinals. Europe's governing body definitely has its finger on the pulse here. More group stage games, please. Anyway, my name's Ryan Bailey. Joining me today as a man who is clutch, but not as clutch as a team that makes the Champions League final after having its first shot on target in the 90th minute Taylor Rockwell, hello. Hello, I will take that comparison because man, what a game that was, what a performance. That was just super fun yesterday. I enjoyed every minute. Yes, we are talking, of course, about Rail Madrid's victory over Manchester City. Spoiler alert if you didn't

see it already. Apologies. Why listen to this podcast if you hadn't, I guess, right, Taylor?

I mean, yeah, I think if you're listening to the review episode, it stands to reason. You're either

okay with spoilers. Did not click the, read the title or maybe have watched the game. But either way,

welcome, and I'm excited to talk about these games. Welcome, everybody. And welcome. Our colleague, joining us, is a man

who, unlike Villarreal, has the stamina to get through the entirety of the task ahead of him. Joe

Lowry. Hello, sir.

Villarreal really did run out of gas there in that second half. That was such a good game. And coming into Wednesday, I thought, okay, maybe City Real Madrid will beat that. But then as we were moving through that first half and even well into the second half, in Madrid, I thought, okay, on today's show, it's just going to be mostly Vio-R-R-R-L Liverpool talk, and we're going to dive into that game really deep. And we're still going to do that.

But then Rodrigo went and did what Rodrigo went and did and did ridiculous things. And I could not,

I honestly could not turn my TV off. I don't generally like stick around to watch the postgame shows and just,

you know, the celebrations on the field. I'm kind of on to the next thing. But I could not look away. It was mesmerizing. That was one of the best games of soccer I've ever seen. So not sticking around for the post game show, you missed Jamie Carriger downing Hynichens live on TV. That's a shame for you. Heaven forbid. And what is, my follow-up question, what is the thing you move on to straight afterwards? Is it ping pong?ong? You've told us before we came on air that you're a ping-pong maestro.

I do.

Okay, maybe maestro's a little bit strong, but I do like ping pong quite a bit. It's not usually my immediate post-game habit, but Ryan, oh boy, it should be. It should be indeed. Rounding at our pack, Joe, we've got a man who is ahead of readmirers for the amount of Twitter of Twitter blue check marks he has, and he's equally re-admires for the number of Champions League finals he's going to be appearing in a matter of weeks, Graham, Rutherman, hello. Hello, I mean, it's a low bar. It's a low bar with Reh-Admires and the number of Champions League finals that he's going to be appearing in. Regarding the checkmarks, Ryan, aren't you the one that is, that's verified on

Instagram, like you're some sort of influencer or something?

Maybe.

Why do you ask?

How?

Do you know who you're talking to, Graham?

Oh, a Kardashian?

A Jenner?

...