Bridging the Divide: Learning to Tend and Befriend

Tara Brach

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4.8 • 10.6K Ratings

🗓️ 14 May 2021

⏱️ 52 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Bridging the Divide: Learning to Tend and Befriend - One of the great sufferings facing us is the growing divide between humans with different views, different realities. This talk looks at several levels of divides—being at war with ourselves, creating separation in our personal relationships, and societal divides. We then reflect on how we can evolve consciousness from the trance of “Fight, Flight, Freeze” to the wholeness that arises with “Tend and Befriend.”

Transcript

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0:00.0	Greetings. We offer these podcasts freely and your support really makes a difference.
0:08.4	To make a donation, please visit tarbrock.com.
0:25.7	I'm a stay and welcome friends. Thanks so much for joining us.
0:32.1	I heard a story about a church committee and the congregation that was ensnared in a bitter
0:40.6	debate about the way some one of their core religious rituals was supposed to be conducted,
0:48.6	who was supposed to perform it and how often and so on.
0:52.5	It was really dividing people into different camps that were becoming increasingly hostiles,
0:57.6	testing friendships. One person suggested that they seek the council of the oldest living
1:05.4	member of the congregation and it was agreed on and they sent out a couple to go speak
1:12.3	with him. They started asking questions. They said, well, way back then they do it this
1:18.9	way and they described one compromise of how to do the ritual. It goes, no, not that way.
1:26.2	They said, well, what about this? They gave an alternative. It goes, no, not that way.
1:31.1	The kept going like this and finally distressed. They said, what are we supposed to do? The
1:37.0	entire congregation is arguing. Everybody is accusing each other. There is really deep
1:42.4	conflict and mistrust. They all said, that's the way we did it.
1:53.2	We know that humans have been in conflict through the eons. Really in the moments that we
2:00.7	feel threatened and it doesn't matter whether it's physically endangered or our views or
2:05.3	challenge or ego's challenge, we quickly regress into survival brain reactivity which is
2:14.5	fight, flight or freeze and it comes off as an anger or hatred or defensiveness or paralysis.
2:25.8	When we're dominated by fight flight, freeze in a chronic way when it's ongoing, we lose
2:33.4	touch with our heart with our full intelligence because we're really living from the most
2:38.6	primitive part of our brain and we feel separate from others and these are the times we can
	...

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