Breaking Up With a Narcissist
Trauma & Narcissism Redefined
Caroline Strawson
4.8 • 701 Ratings
🗓️ 2 March 2021
⏱️ 18 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Today, I want to talk about what happens after we break up with a narcissist, what we should expect from them, and how to prevent being affected by what they can do or say to us and our closest friends.
What You Will Learn In This Episode:
- Safety is your number one priority
- What to do when our reputation is being shredded by the narcissist
- The narcissist and their army of flying monkeys
- What drives narcissists to take action
- Why falling into a love bombing trap is easier than it looks
- Our goal is not trying to change or fix the narcissist
Breaking up a relationship with a narcissist might lead us to a lonely place if they turn our friends and relatives against us. We must create a robust ecosystem around us, and surround ourselves by the people who believe in us. We need to keep in mind that we are enough, and that we are worthy and lovable regardless of what the narcissist could have said to us or to anyone else about us.
Resources:
- Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse
- Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the narcissistic abuse recovery podcast. I'm Caroline Stawson and I'll be sharing with you |
| 0:09.2 | awareness, understanding and education about the devastating effects of narcissistic abuse to help you thrive. |
| 0:16.8 | I want you to know that I've been exactly where you are now and I believe you. And this show |
| 0:22.2 | is all about taking you from trauma to transformation. Today I want to talk to you about |
| 0:32.8 | what's it like actually breaking up from a narcissist? Because it's unlike any other breakup. And I think |
| 0:41.1 | by doing this podcast, my hope and my wish for you is to recognize that whether you're still |
| 0:47.8 | in the relationship with a narcissist or you've maybe just broken up with a narcissist or even |
| 0:52.7 | we're talking six months, one year after you've broken up with a narcissist, or even we're talking six months, one year |
| 0:55.1 | after you've broken up from a narcissist, that you can recognize all of those feelings that |
| 1:01.6 | are going on inside of you right now, that emotional dysregulation, the rapid heart rate, |
| 1:08.9 | the feeling like you want to hide, the getting angry, all of those |
| 1:12.8 | responses are normal with what you have been through. They're not normal in we want you to |
| 1:19.0 | carry on living your life like that, but how you feel right now is exactly how your brain |
| 1:24.8 | thinks you need to be feeling, whether you're in a fight, flight, |
| 1:28.3 | freeze or fawn trauma response, because it believes that it is being like that to keep you safe. |
| 1:35.2 | Remember, the brain's number one job is to keep you safe and to move you away from the biggest |
| 1:39.8 | perceived, remember, key word here, perceived pain. |
| 1:46.4 | So I want to talk to you about what is it actually like breaking up from a narcissist. So some of you may still be in a relationship with |
| 1:51.6 | a narcissist and thinking about how do I leave? What do I do? And the first thing I want to |
| 1:57.9 | reiterate here is safety. It is so vitally important that safety is |
| 2:04.5 | the number one priority because when we are talking about domestic abuse, more murders happen, |
| 2:11.3 | more homicides happen in the first seven days of leaving that domestically abusive |
... |
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