Breaking Up, Breaking Through | John Kim (EP16)
Clear Intentions with Diane Boden
Diane Boden
4.8 • 952 Ratings
🗓️ 24 March 2025
⏱️ 35 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
What if your worst breakup was actually the key to becoming your best self? In his raw and relatable style, John Kim — known as the Angry Therapist — dives deep into the messy, painful, and often transformative world of breakups. Drawing from his own heartbreaks and his experience guiding countless clients through theirs, John identifies eight distinct types of breakups, from the devastating "Big One" to the never-ending on-again, off-again saga. Each breakup, he explains, requires a unique path to healing — and in that process, a new, stronger version of you emerges.
Links Discussed in This Episode |
- Connect with John:
- Website
- Book: Break Up On Purpose: A Catalyst for Growth by John Kim
About John |
John Kim, LMFT, blogs as The Angry Therapist, and practices complete authenticity and transparency with his many clients. He is the bestselling author of It’s Not Me, It’s You, Single On Purpose and I Used to be a Miserable F*ck. He lives in Los Angeles.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | One of the great teachers of life is breakups or what I call expired relationships. |
| 0:06.0 | I think people are now having higher standards, non-negotiables, and they'd rather be single than being something that isn't honest or toxic. |
| 0:13.7 | I actually think as a generation, we're giving up too soon. |
| 0:17.6 | There's a difference between falling in love and having a relationship. |
| 0:20.8 | There's a lot of people falling in love. Not a lot of falling in love and having a relationship. There's a lot of people |
| 0:21.5 | falling in love. Not a lot of people learning how to build the relationship. I think growth is cumulative. |
| 0:26.4 | But healing for me is giving your body, not just your mind, a new corrective love experience. I think |
| 0:33.9 | that's where healing comes is it's a semantic feeling thing. It's not like a logical thing. To be alone with self is more accepted and embraced now more than ever. You have the richest soil for growth after any break up and to take advantage of that instead of trying to find love instantly, take a beat, examine what happened, what was your |
| 0:55.1 | responsibility, what was your ownership? My intentions can't be clear if I'm not honest with myself, |
| 0:59.3 | so I think everything starts there. What if your worst breakup was actually the key to becoming your |
| 1:05.2 | best self? In his raw and relatable style, John Kim, known as the angry therapist, dives deep into the messy, |
| 1:13.3 | painful, and often transformative world of breakups. Drawing from his own heartbreaks |
| 1:18.6 | and his experience guiding countless clients through theirs, John identifies eight distinct |
| 1:23.6 | types of breakups from the devastating big one to the never-ending on again, off again. |
| 1:29.1 | Each breakup, he explains, requires a unique path to healing, and in that process, a new |
| 1:34.3 | stronger version of you emerges. While I recognize that the majority of you are likely not |
| 1:39.9 | going through breakups, you may know someone that is currently going through a breakup or a divorce |
| 1:45.2 | of sorts. Statistically speaking, almost 50% of all marriages in the United States will end in |
| 1:50.8 | divorce or separation. And yet, not a lot of people are talking about what that actually looks like. |
| 1:56.0 | I do want to say that in releasing this episode, it's not me taking a stance on whether or not divorce is right or |
| 2:01.8 | wrong. It's simply a nuanced topic that should be explored in more depth. And I think that you'll hear |
| 2:06.2 | from both John and I in this episode a little bit more about how we've gotten to those conclusions. |
... |
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