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How To Do Everything

Braying Donkeys and Braying Modems

How To Do Everything

NPR

4.21.5K Ratings

🗓️ 13 May 2015

⏱️ 21 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

How to make sense of what your computer is saying, make an uneasy pengiun comfortable, and use up old newspapers. Plus we have a tip to get you through the last week of our Exclamation Point Fast.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

There's a big merger this week, Verizon Bot AOL.

0:04.2

And if you like us, when you hear AOL,

0:07.8

you immediately think of this sound.

0:13.0

Now, I realized, I heard that sound probably a thousand times in the 90s.

0:19.0

Now, I realized, I heard that sound probably a thousand times in the 90s and early 2000s but I actually

0:27.0

have no idea what's going on there.

0:29.4

On the line with this now is a Finnish hacker named Onna who knows all about these sounds.

0:34.5

So yeah, it was it sounded a bit

0:37.6

unnecessary for me to hear all these beads and boobs that I can make no sense of. So first of all this is phone call. It's

0:45.3

particularly a phone call between two computers, within two modems to be

0:48.9

exact. And we have this art language. We start with the basics like, yes, I'm modem, hello.

0:56.8

Okay, so we're going to take what Oana told us and translate the conversation

1:02.3

happening between your computer and the dial-up service into English.

1:08.0

I'm a modem.

1:10.0

Hello, let's talk like modems talk. Yes, let's talk like modems talk.

1:13.0

Yes, let's talk, like modems, because we are modems.

1:17.0

I am testing the phone line.

1:19.0

Does this sound okay?

1:20.0

It sounds great, my modem friend.

1:23.0

How fast can we transfer data?

1:25.0

Very fast, even though it's the 90s.

1:27.0

Great.

...

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