Bittersweet: How Sadness Is A Superpower With Susan Cain - Ep 138
Dear Shandy
Sharleen Joynt & Andy Levine
4.9 • 4K Ratings
🗓️ 23 June 2022
⏱️ 78 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This is Sharleen's all-time favorite Hot Topic conversation. You will probably also learn more about Andy's mind and thought process here than in any other episode Shandy's ever done. Are you deeply moved by sad music? Do you find comfort in a rainy day? Does the word "poignant" resonate with you? If you answered "yes" to these, you just may be the Bittersweet type. (Spoiler alert: so are both Sharleen and Andy!) According to our esteemed guest, author Susan Cain: "Bittersweetness is a tendency to states of longing, poignancy, and sorrow; an acute awareness of passing time; and a curiously piercing joy at the beauty of the world." She argues there's great power in the bittersweet outlook on life and why our society has been so blind to its value. We discuss everything from being inherently melancholic in a happiness-obsessed culture, to navigating being a Bittersweet type's partner, to several existential questions of Andy's.To say this episode was a highlight of Shandy's near two years of podcasting is an understatement. And be sure to listen to the Shandy Debrief to understand why speaking with Susan meant so much to Sharleen!
Thanks to our sponsors!
- Download the free Upside app and use code SHANDY to get up to $5 cash back off your first purchase of $10 or more!
- Go to https://www.apostrophe.com/SHANDY and use code SHANDY to get your first dermatology visit for only $5!
More Susan:
- Buy "Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole": https://amzn.to/3OxeUdN
- Buy "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking": https://amzn.to/3QFXeyv
- Instagram: http://instagram.com/susancainauthor
- Website: https://susancain.net
0:00 - Welcome To Our Esteemed Guest, Author Susan Cain!
3:21 - What Does “Bittersweet” Mean?
4:35 - What Strengths And Weaknesses Do Bittersweets Have And How Do Those Play Out In Relationships?
6:56 - Advice For Non-Bittersweets In Relationships With Bittersweets?
9:50 - Is There A Correlation Between Bittersweetness And Introversion?
11:24 - Sad Songs And Lullabies And Fragility And Mortality
21:35 - Are Some People More Predisposed To Melancholy And Is It Cultural?
26:41 - Is Sadness More Potent An Emotion Than Happiness Or Contentment?
29:27 - Is There A Correlation Between Bittersweetness And Intelligence?
31:37 - Is It Possible To Be Truly Happy And A Great Artist?
33:55 - Are We Sadder Than We Would Be If We Weren’t In A Happiness-Obsessed Society?
35:53 - What Might Bittersweetness Or Melancholy Actually Be Depression?
38:14 - How Can One Overcome The Fear Of Joy When Joy Is Fleeting And The Loss Of Joy Hurts More Than Joy Itself?
40:22 - Is It Possible To Let Go Of All Of Life’s What-Ifs?
42:00 - Is Ignorance Of The Bittersweet Bliss, Or Is Bliss Discovered Through The Bittersweet?
43:57 - Without Death, Would There Be Human Motivation To Do Anything Ambitious?
45:29 - Andy’s Dark “Would You Rather” Question
52:14 - Awareness Versus Acceptance Of Importance
54:13 - Is One Of The Reasons For Today’s Prevalence Of Mental Health Issues Because Parents Are Not Giving Children A Proper Version Of Reality?
57:46 - Her Advice For Finding Purpose And Motivation After A Long Period Of Sadness
1:00:05- From A Shandy: “I Feel The Most Sadness After I Make A Big Life Decision, Even When I know It’s The Right Choice. Why Is This?”
1:03:49 - Tips For How To Not Absorb Others’ Grief
1:05:14 - Another Existential Question Of Andy’s
1:08:50 - Shandy’s Final And Self-Indulgent Question
1:13:10 - Shandy Debrief
If you have a relationship question, write us at: dearshandy@gmail.com
Support this podcast: https://redcircle.com/dear-shandy/donations
More Dear Shandy
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dearshandy
Facebook - https://fb.me/dearshandy
More Sharleen
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sharleenjoynt
Blog - http://www.alltheprettypandas.com
More Andy
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/machinelevine
Produced by Gabrielle Galon - https://www.instagram.com/gabsamillion
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | I feel like there are different kinds of superpowers that are on offer, right? |
| 0:05.5 | There's like, there's lightsabers and some people get those and there's |
| 0:08.8 | wizards magic and some people get those and you have to use the one that has been granted to you |
| 0:15.2 | and really use it to its maximum. |
| 0:22.8 | Welcome back to Dear Shandy listeners. Hello Andy. Hello. How are you today? |
| 0:27.7 | Doing great. I'm excited for our guest. It's a very, very exciting guest. I have to tell you I have |
| 0:33.1 | some personal attachment to this guest because I did read her her first book, which was very famous |
| 0:39.1 | the book that we all know about and it made a huge impact on my life and I think sort of changed |
| 0:44.2 | me and my life in some ways. So I'm very excited. But first let me get to who she is. We are joined |
| 0:50.0 | today by Susan Kane, the author of Bittersweet. You already know her as the author of Quiet, |
| 0:56.8 | the power of introverts in a world that can't stop talking, which has been translated into 40 languages, |
| 1:03.2 | spent eight whopping years on the New York Times bestseller list and was named the number one |
| 1:08.7 | best book of the year by Fast Company Magazine. LinkedIn named her the top sixth influencer in the |
| 1:15.5 | world and Fast Company named her one of its most creative people in business. I'm still going. Her |
| 1:22.4 | writing has appeared in the New York Times, the Atlantic, the Economist, the Wall Street Journal, |
| 1:26.8 | among many others and her TED talks on the power of introverts and the hidden power of sad songs |
| 1:32.4 | and rainy days have been viewed over 40 million times and her latest book, Bittersweet. |
| 1:39.9 | How sorrow and longing make us whole is another number one New York Times bestseller and makes the |
| 1:45.3 | argument that sadness is a superpower. There's power in the Bittersweet Outlook on life and why we've |
| 1:51.4 | been so blind to its value. You can find her on Instagram at Susan Kane author and she has a |
| 1:57.6 | wonderful newsletter on her website, Susancane.net. We're thrilled to be joined today by Wordsmith |
| 2:04.7 | and observer extra-ordinaire Susan Kane. Thank you so much for joining us. |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Sharleen Joynt & Andy Levine, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of Sharleen Joynt & Andy Levine and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.