Big, Bad, and Bullied All Over

Ordinary People. Ordinary Things. with Melissa Radke

Melissa Radke

Eatcake, Religion & Spirituality, Redribbon, Eatcakebebrave, Ordinarypeople, Christianity, Thissucksbutgodisgood, Thissucks, Comedy, Ordinarypeopleordinarythings, Melissaradke

5 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 14 August 2018

⏱️ 43 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

School is starting, and I’m nervous. Remi is starting middle school. I’m not worried about Remi, I know that she can handle herself. I’m actually worried about how I have done with Remi. There comes a time when we throw are children out into the deep end and see if they can swim. Have we said the right things? Have we taught our children to rescue themselves and to rescue others?

Kids are growing up faster than ever. Changing one kid at a time can help change the culture. My good friend and hairdresser Wendy is on the show today. She has a beautiful and vivacious daughter named Christian who experienced severe bullying at a new school. Wendy shares their story and how they overcame it through the power of forgiveness and God.

You can find Melissa here:

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Show Notes

[05:35] Wendy is Melissa's hairdresser and they have known each other for 10 years.
[07:23] Wendy and her husband were in Lufkin for 18 years. They decided to move, so her husband could find work.
[08:17] They moved in the middle of the school year when Wendy's daughter was in the ninth grade.
[09:09] Wendy thought the smaller school district would be awesome.
[10:14] Christian was 15 and Wendy began to notice some changes in her.
[11:01] Christian wasn't making friends, and she stopped doing her hair, wearing makeup, and wearing cute clothes.
[12:09] Wendy noticed changes in Christian.
[12:46] Her grades started to slip.
[13:36] Wendy started talking to teachers and counselors.
[14:34] Christian saw a professional counselor. She also started her mad journal with her mad feelings.
[16:19] Everything culminated the day the principal called Wendy and said that Christian has Saturday detention.
[17:43] Christian said to Wendy, I need for you to love me and listen to me.
[18:59] Christian was being bullied by a group of girls at school. The video was on Instagram.
[20:07] She was confronted with the mob mentality. They swarmed her and Christian was crying. She never stopped listening. She knew in the grand scheme of things that these people didn't matter.
[23:11] In the video, Christian was alone against the entire school.
[24:55] Are kids can't be superheroes all the time, but they shouldn't be part of the mob.
[25:36] Wendy did not want Christian to be a victim.
[26:34] Wendy knew she had to talk to the principle with a calm heart.
[27:41] Wendy wants her kids to be able to deal with situations. She didn't want her kid to be the one causing trouble.
[28:38] It's a fine line to walk as a parent. Be real, but don't be blind to what is happening.
[30:02] Living by the holy spirit and living by the nudge.
[31:21] A mother's love is so great, but we have to listen to the holy spirit.
[31:59] The school district gave them a lot of apologies.
[32:42] Christian wanted to go back to the Lufkin school district. She is living with family in Lufkin.
[33:22] She is happy and healthy and doing great.
[34:13] Christian decided she needed to forgive the bully who bullied her.
[36:59] Bullying can break you and change you. You need to decide how you are going to built back up.
[37:51] Christian is not going to be the victim, and she is now an anti-bullying advocate and a great friend.
[39:51] Lightning round…
[41:05] Melissa wants to raise not only a good swimmer, but a lifeguard.

Thanks for joining us on Ordinary People Ordinary Things. Be sure to subscribe to our podcast on iTunes and leave a nice review. Just like your mother taught you.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi y'all you're listening to ordinary people ordinary things with me your host Melissa Radke the
0:07.2	ordinariest of us all. School is starting back and I think it's safe to say I'm nervous.
0:27.1	Rimmie will be going into middle school and I will not be one of those crazy parents that say I have cried and cried just thinking about my baby walking the middle school halls. No, I'm not going to cry. That's her daddy. The truth is, I'm not really worried about what could happen to
0:41.1	Remy. Remy can handle herself. What I am the most worried about is how I have done with Remy. You see parents
0:49.1	there comes a time in our kids life when we throw them out there in the deep end and we see if they can
0:55.3	swim did we teach them to float did we teach them to breathe properly did we teach them
1:01.6	how to rescue themselves if they go off too far?
1:05.0	That's the best analogy I can give today's topic is swimming.
1:09.0	Did we teach them to swim?
1:11.0	When my kids were very, very young, we knew we were moving to a home that had a pool. And Rocco was an infant, and he took those infant survival swimming classes. And on the very last class, we had to take him completely covered in
1:25.1	clothes head to toe even a little hoodie up over his head shoes socks on the
1:29.0	whole bit and the teacher throws him in the deep end and we see him fight to come back up and to turn himself
1:36.0	over. It's on a videotape. I can't even talk about it, nor have I ever watched it to this day.
1:40.8	But I also never worried about him drowning. And so it is with life.
1:44.8	Did we teach them well enough? Did we say the right things and instill the right things?
1:49.2	Did we do the best we could in teaching them how to swim? Can they rescue themselves? Can they rescue others?
1:56.0	I can promise you that when I close my eyes and imagine Remy Hope walking the halls of
2:01.1	middle school, it isn't her that I'm as worried about as what it is inside of her.
2:08.0	We are at a perilous time in our society. Our kids are becoming adults so much sooner than we had ever wanted them to be.
2:15.1	This isn't always their fault, I will admit, but covering their ears and eyes.
2:19.3	Looking reality in the eye and denying it isn't helping anyone. We might not can change the culture, but we can change the kids.
2:27.0	And to change them, to teach them, to require things of them, well let's just say, if we begin to change one kid at a time, before you know it, we've changed
	...

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