meta_pixel
Tapesearch Logo
Log in
Pulling The Thread with Elise Loehnen

Being a Good Enough Person (Dolly Chugh)

Pulling The Thread with Elise Loehnen

Elise Loehnen

Society & Culture, Religion & Spirituality, Self-improvement, Education

4.8900 Ratings

🗓️ 20 October 2022

⏱️ 53 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

“What I'm positing is, is an ability to grapple with contradiction. So that's the paradox mindset that Wendy Smith, Maryanne Lewis and other scholars have shown that when we're able to sit with two conflicting things in our minds, for example that if we stick with the example in South Africa, it may be true that if I'm a student that my parents and my grandparents participated in actively supported apartheid and that they were also wonderful parents and grandparents, right? Like those two things can be true, and being able to sit with that contradiction gives me. Like emotional limberness to kind of, you know, push my way through the, the emotional slog of this is awful. This is awful. And to sit with terrible things happened, that's the only way you can do it.” So says Dolly Chugh, award-winning social psychologist at the NYU Stern School of Business, where she is an expert researcher in the psychology of people and goodness. Her first book is the wonderful, The Person You Mean to Be and she just released a second, called, A More Just Future: Psychological Tools for Reckoning with Our Past and Driving Social Change. Both books serve as inspiring, yet practical guides for those of us who seek to be better. A More Just Future builds on Chugh’s first book, which equipped readers with the tools to be “good-ish” people who stand up for their values. In her latest, she offers a guide to reckoning with the whitewashed history of our country in order to build a better future.  The seeds of today’s inequalities were sown in the past, she tells us, and it will take an extra dose of resilience and grit to grapple with the truth of our history and to make the systemic changes needed to mend the fabric of our country. Moving from willful ignorance to willful awareness isn’t easy, leading to uncomfortable feelings of shame, guilt, disbelief, and resistance when we encounter revelations that run against what we have long been told. But it is possible to love your country with a broken heart, she says, imploring us to grapple with contradiction, employing the paradox mindset as we shift from the rigidness of “either/or” to the nuance of “both/and.”  EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: Wired for consistency… Light vs. heat-based change… Sitting in paradox… Belief grief… MORE FROM DOLLY CHUGH: A More Just Future: Psychological Tools for Reckoning with Our Past and Driving Social Change The Person You Mean to Be: How Good People Fight Bias “How to let go of being a "good" person—and become a better person,” TED Talk Check out Dolly's Website Follow her on Twitter and Instagram “The Truth About Rosa Parks And Why It Matters To Your Diversity Initiative,” Forbes To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hi, it's Elise Lunan, host of Pulling the Thread. Today's guest is the wonderful Dolly Chug,

0:06.3

social psychologist, stern business school professor, and author of A More Just Future,

0:11.7

psychological tools for reckoning with our past and driving social change.

0:16.6

Hi, friends, throughout this holiday season, you will find me right here per normal.

0:22.4

We will keep publishing new episodes every week and a few solos thrown in as well.

0:28.9

So when you just need to escape from the business of the holiday shuffle or take a break from mom or dad or who knows who, we'll be here as we always are.

0:48.8

Hi, it's Elise Lunan, host of pulling the thread. I'm an author, podcast host, and parent who built a long

0:55.5

career in media. I grew up in a state of perpetual curiosity, investigating the world and asking

1:01.7

a lot of questions. In this show, I chat with culture-defining leaders, thinkers, and experts

1:07.8

about this rare moment that we find ourselves in and how to think about

1:11.6

our own lives and experiences within a larger social and spiritual construct.

1:17.6

What I'm positing it is is an ability to grapple with contradiction.

1:23.1

So that's the paradox mindset that Wendy Smith, Mary Ann Lewis, and other scholars have shown

1:28.8

that when we're able to sit with two conflicting things in our minds, for example, that if

1:35.4

we stick with the example in South Africa, it may be true that if I'm a student, that my parents

1:42.3

and my grandparents participated in actively supported apartheid

1:47.5

and that they were also wonderful parents and grandparents.

1:51.3

Like, those two things can be true.

1:53.2

And being able to sit with that contradiction gives me the, like, emotional limberness to kind of you know push my way through the the emotional

2:06.5

slog of this is awful this is awful and to sit with terrible things happened that's the only way

2:13.2

you can do it is it so says dolly ch, award-winning social psychologist at the NYU Stern School of

2:19.3

Business, where she is an expert researcher in the psychology of people and goodness. Her first book

...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Elise Loehnen, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Elise Loehnen and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.

Copyright © Tapesearch 2025.