Hello, and welcome back to practicing human, the podcast where every day we're getting a little better at life.

I'm your host, Corey Miscarra, and in today's episode, we're going to talk about why you often have more wisdom than you think.

More to come on that in a moment. First, let's settle in together with the sound of the bells.

Okay, so I want to speak to those moments where something feels off, where you feel scared, where you're uncertain about something, and your first response is to go to someone for support, companionship, or advice.

Maybe your therapist, maybe a partner, friend, colleague, but just those moments where you feel, I'm disoriented, I don't know what to do, I feel unsafe, and there's this impulse to go to someone for advice, or help, or support.

First, let me just say, I think that impulse is beautiful. It is one that is often...

I think we need to normalize responding to it. A lot of us, we've been conditioned to sort of go through hardship just ourselves and not reach out for help.

So I think there's a huge process and often a growth process for many people to feel that impulse of, I could use help, and then to notice overriding it and then going into, I can get through this myself when actually what is needed or the greater training could be to recognize that it's okay to need help.

So that's a big process for a lot of people. And with that said, there are often a lot of moments where we might default to that, where if we actually gave it a few more moments of reflection, we might realize where more equipped and more resource to make this moment than we might think.

And a very simple way to explore that is when you feel that sense of being overwhelmed and feel like you need help or you need someone else to offer advice.

You just take a breath and then just say to yourself, alright, what do we need right now?

If we were to be our own therapist, our own coach, what would we say to ourselves in this moment? What would we remind ourselves of?

How would we encourage ourselves? And it could just be simply, hey, Corey, yeah, alright, this is intense right now.

Just remember, you're safe, you know that. And what do you feel like you need to do right now? Maybe it's take a walk. Maybe you need to take a couple of deep breaths, a few minutes to meditate.

Or maybe you just need to remind yourself that this experience will pass, even though it feels really intense right now, it will pass. And you're okay.

A lot of times, if we just take a few moments to check in with ourselves, to check in with the resource part of us and take the perspective of being our own therapist, our own counselor, our own coach.

We're reminded that we actually do have quite a few skills and insights to pull on. And I mean, think of all the different books you've read and different aspects of forms of advice you've been given over the years from people.

And we have that still, but we often overlook it in these moments where we feel fear and the default is just, okay, I need to reach out to this person because that's my go to person for when things are off.

And as I said, maybe you have to use your own discernment around like, is that the right path for you? Or if you were to take a few breaths and just take the perspective of talking to yourself, what would you say?

And you might be surprised at some response you have, how you would coach yourself, how you would encourage yourself.

So this is a big part of one learning to reparent ourselves, to become our own secure base. You know, a therapist helps us to do that. They become a stable base for us.

Someone to hold what we're going through and for us to feel that there can be a steady presence while we're navigating a lot of difficult experiences.

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