I am Sarah Jane Case and this is Anya Graham and Coffee.

Hello friends, welcome back to the podcast. Today we are talking with Melanie Rashbaum,

a licensed marriage and family therapist supporting clients in her private practice,

the Italian medicine or in-person sessions in Los Angeles, California. Melanie, welcome to the show.

Thank you so much. I'm so thrilled to be here. Talk about the human condition.

I feel like there are certain people who I know through the DMs, right? Like I have your name in

my DMs. Like I know your profile picture, you can like see your name. And so it's so fun to have

you here. I was wondering if you remembered that I was the person who asked about type 4 and

relationships, even though I already know what I want to hear it from you. I want my free little,

you know, 30-second therapy session on an Instagram story from you. I love it. It's so fun.

Well, I'm so excited that you're here and we are going to get to talk about attachment theory,

which I know everyone is very, very interested in. Yes. So for those at home who are unfamiliar,

what is attachment theory? Okay. So I'm going to give the basics just because I assume people can

Google that the people that discovered this after doing research with infants, John Bulby,

Mary Ainsworth, they can look up those names. But attachment theory came from this experiment

that Mary Ainsworth did called the strange situation. So for all intents and purposes,

it was about a baby and a mother in a room and then the mother leaving the room and then coming

back and how did the baby respond or react? Did they become dysregulated or not?

And so what they discovered is that there are essentially three types of attachment styles,

which is secure, anxious and avoidant. You're going to hear other terms like disorganized or

fearful, avoidant or fearful, anxious or and they're all relevant. But just like I said,

to keep things simple, we're going to go with secure, avoidant and anxious. And so the way

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